Tuesday, March 22, 2011

American Idol Tomorrow!

I've been sick with a raging head cold so i'm working towards feeling well enough to prop myself in front of the TV for two hours of judgemental bliss tomorrow night. American Idol...
Did you know that Casey is only 19? Firstly that surprises me because of his confidence onstage and secondly because i suspect he will look exactly that way when he's 60 except the curly mop will be grey. If he got a great haircut this week, let the stylist dress him and upped his image, wonders would not cease. Now's the time to bring something super new to the table Casey. I suggest hair. I like Pia...OK i love you girlfriend but you gotta do a faster song this week or my love is going to be challenged. Take some steps, sing something uptempo. Get out from behind the mic and mix it up. Haley, you gotta do that gravelly blues thing with your voice and sell us like you've been living on the streets for the last three years and not a college dorm room. Thea (Disney Girl), I hate to tell a teen to drink before they sing but you need to let loose a bit this week. And i know the theme of Motown will be difficult for you young' uns but throw some moves in, twirl your skirt, bend down to low five the audience at least once. Be 16 or whatever you age is. Stefano - tomorrow you will bring the house down because Motown is your thang, baby. Jacob - ditto- even tho you're shook up about your friend Nate Dogg's death this week. Go for it on stage but keep those notes in line. Not too sharp. Paul - smiley man- look good, keep smiling, keep up what you're doing 'cause although it's strange singing, it's unique. Naima, please sing on key. I want you to be good so baaaad. Don't make us think we kept you for the outfits. James, even though you are used to singing about 'whores' and are now very regrettful of saying that, just do what you do with that thing you do it with and go for it, like always. You rock. Literally. Who's left? Scotty, that's who. On Motown night i think if he does something like Papa was a Rolling Stone, he'd have them on their feet. Don't you? And Lauren...keep the faith, loose the fear and sing your heart out tomorrow little girl. You'll make the top ten and get to tour this summer for sure.
One last note about Fergie...although everyone thinks she had major P.Surgery, I think that she just parted her hair on the side and her usual ability to cut a pound or two off her cheeks was eliminated. That's all.
Tune in Thursday for my spewing about what went down.

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