Tuesday, April 30, 2013

Take This Job and Shove It

 You know that song "Take this Job and Shove It"? I kinda did one of those on Saturday. Except, being me, I simply walked out of a meeting quietly and said "I'm done."
I don't like a lot of conflict.Can you tell by the last sentence? And, I like to be liked. Which got me in this situation in the first place. Someone at my job did not like me and my sales methods, and was hating on me for weeks. I dreaded working with her but thought we'd come to an understanding. Until she started up again last Friday. In front of customers, she basically told me that I was stealing her sales. Understand that although we sell designer jeans and expensive clothes, we are not on commission.
Long story short, a pow wow was called to try to get to the bottom of her angst (or so I thought) but when we all sat down, she took over the meeting, it was allowed, and I walked out when she told untruths about things she thought I did. Let me just spew here that I was one of the top sales people at this store in 2012 and am well liked by almost everyone. Really.
I loved my job. Selling clothes to women was so much fun over the last 15 months. I loved every aspect of working for America's biggest department store. The pay wasn't much but it was and enjoyable place to work. When it stopped being fun and it was evident that someone did not like me - ALOT- I couldn't stay. It was ruined for me.
I'm sorry that I let mean girl win but glad that I left before I told her to shut her pie hole, which apparently I did one time on the ski hill in Whistler when someone tried my patience a little too much.
I think leaving quietly was a lovely way to end a job. And to just not show up for work on Monday but assume they heard me, was even more lovely. Especially after it felt like a Saturday ambush in the ole' corral and I was what they were having for dinner. There was no staying after mean girl was allowed to go on and on.
So, readers, if you are ever faced with a situation where you just can't stay and keep the piehole comment in your mouth, I invite you to stand up, say you are done and go look for alternate ways to make money.
Like writing books! The second installment in The Husband Hunt is now done and will be published this week. The Dream Jumper's Promise gets a new cover tomorrow and goes to .99 for ten days!  And, along with Christine M. Fairchild, I am entering into a new venture as one of a group called BEACH READ AUTHORS.
Lots to do now that I'm not working at my day job.

Over and Out!

Sunday, April 21, 2013

Why Women Love "The Bachelor" on ABC

These next words are only my opinion and not the opinion of the dogs who lie snoring beside me.

The Bachelor. America's mindless phenomenon. I watch it faithfully and my sister, who is the smart one in our family can't get enough of the reality TV show that appears, blessedly, on Monday nights- which is a good night after a weekend, because it gives us something to look forward to after getting up for work on Monday, right? But, The Bachelor comes only twice a year and we have to wait and wait between shows, forced to watch Dancing with The Stars because now the last Bachelor Sean Lowe has joined the dancing reality show to get enough money to buy a house or something like that. We only get to see our beloved Bachelor show half of the nights out of the year. Damned. Can't they produce more shows? Come on ABC. And now Bachelor Pad (which was a terrible cross between The Bachelor and a hedonistic semi-porn game show) is not filming this year for our summer enjoyment. What's a viewer to do?
The Bachelor and The Bachelorette are wildly popular TV reality shows. Wildly. Just see how many followers Chris Harrison has on Twitter. Or join Bachelor Nation on FB or twitter. Why is there such appeal to intelligent women who have high stress jobs, who manage families, have been married for twenty years, or even young women who are looking for love? The Bachelor is not just for women either. Even men watch this show, with no worries about how others will gauge their masculinity. (My husband gets a beer and sits himself in front of the TV for The Bachelor, calling out opinions on what he thinks the guys should do or should not do-he loves it!).

ABC's The Bachelor is watched by all age groups, demographics and genders. The Bachelorette, its sister show  is equally popular. If you don't watch the show or have never heard of it (where have you been living? In a cave in Borneo?) the young woman chooses between twenty-five single men, as opposed to The Bachelor where  one man chooses between twenty-five single women. As a nation, we love to watch the drama of a villain among the seemingly nice contestants,(Tiara) the horror of a fan favorite not getting a rose, (Lindsey) or the unthinkable of the mean girl getting proposed to (Courtney).
Why do we tune in every Monday night ( in droves) to watch someone whittle the list down to one hopeful candidate for a lasting relationship? It is mindless FUN, that's why. If love makes the world go 'round, and what the world needs now is love, sweet love, then the quest for love and partnering up is very important in our lives. Maybe the most important thing we, as human beings, have. And watching someone on their quest of this is voyeurism at its finest. We get to see someone during the dating process and it's only rated PG. We are not peeking in on anything that would be considered naughty or twisted. We are simply watching a person doing the most normal human thing possible-look for love.
As someone who's been married twenty-one years, I have two thoughts on why my husband and I sit down on Monday nights to ravage every second of this show like the characters were beloved relatives/friends who we care deeply about. One, is that we are past the initial romantic buzz of our relationship and have long been in the comfortable, I love- you- no- matter- what stage and watching someone who's jazzed on that initial attraction brings back memories and emotions we haven't felt in a long time. And two, is that after a long day with teenagers, chores, work, the dog chewing a hole in the dry wall, stress, we just want to watch something that's entertaining and makes us feel happy without investing too much emotion. After the Rose Ceremony and our favorite is eliminated, we don't go around all week mourning the event. We simply pick a new favorite. Isn't that lovely and so unlike real life when a boyfriend dumps you and you spend three months wondering where you went wrong? We walk away at the end of the show, commiserate on what the problem was and go to bed, our psyches only slightly affected by the bachelor's rejection of our favorite contestant.
If you're an avid fan of the reality show franchise, you know that groups congregate all around the country on Monday nights to watch the show, in neighborhoods, sororities, bars and girlfriend's houses. The Bachelor has become a cultural phenomenon. Tabloid magazines carry the latest news on the contestants, and opinions breed like bunnies on what's going to happen as the road to the Final Rose gets twisty .

After the proposal on national TV, the media heyday begins and the remaining lovey-dovey couple, barely has a chance of surviving as dirt is dug up, pictures of the individuals drinking shots off another girls' abdomen surface and the media struggles to tear the young love birds apart. Very few have survived the onslaught. Ryan and Trista come to mind, and so far Jason and Molly but remember, he originally chose someone else and broke up with his chosen one to go back to get his heartbroken Molly. As a nation we yearn for a happy couple but also can't resist what the media has found against them. Dang.
Emily and Jef didn't have a chance, especially if she was texting another man. The press dove on that one like a hungry tiger and then it was all over before it even got very far off the ground. I wanted that to work. What about you? They seemed perfect for each other. What the heck happened there? They were cute and full of benevolent aspirations, as well as love for each other. As much as I cheered them on and cringed at Ari's advancement as the weeks went on, I didn't shed any tears over the breakup and that's what I'm talking about. All the buzz without the investment. Or at least some of the buzz without actually kissing anyone who's not your husband.
I'm not entirely sure why everyone watches The Bachelor. Unless you are like me. Life is tough (as my mother used to say when I was a carefree teen), and there is so much stress and so many obstacles to overcome on a daily basis. To simply plant oneself in front of the boob tube for one hour a week and listen in on someone's quest for love is a blessed event. Especially if everyone is dressed to the nines, showing off a little skin here and there, kissing and flirting in romantic locations, and it's a game we can play at home. And it's free TV. Not cable. Ongoing TV, something you can count on twice a year for Monday night entertainment. It's love and we all know - Love is All You Need. The Beatles told us this. Tra La La

Over and Out

Kim Hornsby is the author of the short novella The Husband Hunt, available on Amazon books for Kindle or download. It's a two hour read similar to watching The Bachelor and The Husband Hunt 2- Kat's Season
She's also the author of the novel The Dream Jumper's Promise, nominated for BEST INDIE FIRST BOOK (click on the cover above) or http://amzn.com/B00AA4FAJC
and Necessary Detour, published with The Wild Rose Press. http://amzn.com/B00AU50M76
Both novels are Romantic Women's Fiction with strong elements of Suspense

Monday, April 1, 2013

I am Not a Team Player/Blogger

Firstly, let me say I'm sorry. I am not a social blogger. At all. I want to be but I'm not. I actually get gaggy when I visit other blogs. Aren't we just supposed to spew on our own, like it's therapy? As a writer, it's almost socially expected to visit around, comment, invite people over for guest posts. I'm not sure I like this or, more to the point, can do this for years on end.
I just want to spew my thoughts on my own blog. Like this. Write to my heart's content and not worry if anyone is reading. This is how Blogging works great for me. If someone reads, then fine. But typing my thoughts like this is all I want. To invite others to this site isn't what I envisioned when I signed up to blog. As someone who loves the sound of their own voice on paper, I just want this. To narcissistically spew. How do you spell that MOFO anyhow? People who host authors every few days probably have ice buckets handy in their own homes and entertain a lot. I admire them but I can't do it.
So, do not look for interesting guests here anytime soon. This is my place. I don't invite people over. It isn't that it's too messy but this is where I go to get away from the social media expectations. It' s like my backyard tree fort except I'm 55 years old and expected to have a semblance of maturity in the real house.
I do go occasionally to the neighbor's to guest blog. I must admit, it's not terrible but I can't wait to get back to my place afterwards. The couches aren't as comfy, the snacks aren't as good, it' s not my home and I can't stay long.
Just now, I went to comment on someone's blog who I know through writing, someone I genuinely wanted to support, then ran back to my own blog to write this. I am not a wanderer when it comes to blogging. And I'm not much of a team player when it comes to tweeting other people's plugs for their books. Especially if I haven't read them. I'm sorry. I do it anyhow. I try but it's hard to blindly offer my valued opinion. I wasn't much for baseball either. I was a tennis player. That probably says it all.
So if you want to blog over here, (and you probably don't now that I've admitted this) I'm not sure I can open the door for you. Very few even come down this street or walk by this house so I doubt it's worth it. For me this blog is wonderful because I just type away knowing no one really reads it. And that's what I love about my blog.
Over and out!