The Bachelor - Arie

Ari wasn't my favorite. I didn't even learn to correctly spell his name.
He said "Yeah" a lot.
He said "I love you," a lot.
When you accept the post to be The Bachelor, you must also accept the public's scrutiny of you. I just read he's worried about the finale tonight. I predict he picks no one. Did anyone notice Chris H did not ask him if he was in love last night? Well, he didn't. The first ever in Bachelor history.

Here's what Ari did right, in my opinion:

Nice hair, not dyed so the grey doesn't show
Gave Crystal her just desserts on Women Tell All by cutting her off
Didn't eat steroids or work at his buffed body (which it was not)
Looked great in a suit
Did not focus on the women's bikini bodies

Here's where Ari can improve for his next turn at The Bachelor because you know he's coming back:

Learn how to eliminate the words "Like" "Yeah" and "I Love That," from his verbiage
Don't wear black ankle socks after a Fantasy suite date
Take a course in how to express yourself eloquently -- ask pro football players how they do it
Don't tell everyone you love them, it makes them think they are the winner of the contest
If an ex flies to Peru to take away your girlfriend, don't invite him in

Can't wait to see what happens in the FINALE tonight.

The Men Agreed to Play a Gentleman's Game

Last night on The Bachelorette's, The Men Tell All, we got a glimpse in to a fine looking group of men who were competing for the same woman on National TV, but that didn't deter them from remembering their manners.

Early on in the season of competing for Rachel's attentions, apparently, they agreed to play a gentleman's game with respect to each other. Not get nasty.
How cool is that? This group of bachelors was the most articulate, honorable, respectful group I think I've ever seen on Men Tell All, and I've seen pretty much every episode since the beginning.
In the group, there was one man who did not play a gentleman's game. He chose the low road, baiting one man to distraction, making his experience miserable and causing The Bachelorette, Rachel, to doubt both men. It was a shame that Lee ruined the game for Kenny and we knew that if Lee showed up to Men Tell All last night, he would get raked across the coals.
He did get raked, from the Bachelor producers and from the men, but with the men it was in a gentlemanly fashion. The men eloquently articulated how Lee played the game dishonestly, they backed Kenny and Lee confessed he lied and cheated to make Kenny look bad. Lee's on-camera interviews made my skin crawl to think that someone was out to ruin another man's chances at love. And Kenny is a father, a single father raising a ten-year-old girl!
In the first half of last night's show, Lee still had that smarmy grin on his face but when Chris Harrison pulled up a sexist tweet and a racist tweet from Lee, a year ago, that grin left Lee's face in a moment of "Oh, shit, this is bad!" We got to see what we think is the real Lee, telling America he learned a lot from this experience and is still learning. Apparently there were two Lee's--the one we got to see in those private interviews and the one that made two friends in the house.
Lee is an aspiring singer/songwriter and we know why those people come on The Bachelorette, don't we? After this display, I'm not sure this villain will get any contracts offered.

Last night's Men Tell All was a bold show and could've gone so sideways when those tweets hit the screen but Lee saw the writing on the wall (literally) and apologized to the men and later to Rachel. He saved his skin and Kenny did the honorable thing by saying on National TV that he did not think Lee's vendetta was race-based then agreed to hug it out with him.

Watching Men Tell All last night was one of the first times I've ever felt enlightened in anything socially important by this show. The men, especially the African American men who talked about race problems and persecution and the NCAA, should be proud of what they did last night to educate the American audience that playing a gentleman's game (in life) is the honorable way to go.
I walked away from The Men Tell All feeling like I'd learned something, I'd witnessed something great on TV, something historical. And that is not easy to say with a show like The Bachelor!

Hometowns Reveal One Favorite on The Bachelor

Monday's episode of The Bachelor began in Colorado where deer run free and snow is plentiful. This week was hometown dates and Jo Jo was in town to see Chase and meet his family.

After a talk on a rock, they went to his house, that he owns (I'm assuming) and talked about Chase's divorced parents and once estranged father. Ding dong. It's Dad at the door!
Hard feelings seem to have been buried and Chase admitted to his father, "I'm diving in to this one, Dad," which made me fear for the reserved hunk. At the mom's house, everyone gathered, including a baby with a mustache pacifier and Chase's mom, who is hip and cool!
When the familial evening is over and we officially like Chase immensely, she and Chase kiss at the black SUV and she's off into the darkness to meet the other four families.

Next is Chico, CA, Playboy Magazine's pick for best Party college, years ago, and we're off to Jordan's home. In matching outfits he and Jo Jo go to the high school to meet the football coaches who have a pinup board of both Rogers boys all over their walls. Turns out, Aaron Rogers is a big quarterback in football and doesn't speak to Jordan, maybe even the whole family, and won't show for the family visit. I"m not a huge NFL fan but recognize the bro from the Green Bay Packers. Good riddance if he doesn't talk to anyone. The Rogers live in a gorgeous Victorian home and both parents seem lovely. Luke, the other brother, brings his G/F who seems nice. The visit is wonderful even though they pan in on the two empty seats at one end of the table like Aaron should have been there. Sappy.

Next is Florida. Robby. He and Jo Jo walk around, talking. When they get to the family home, the dad is a coach of some sort, and the mom, who's birthed five kids, is a rock. She talks about Holly, the ex-GF whose roommate (are you following me here?) has granted an interview to say that Robby broke up with Holly to go on the Bachelor. There's talk in the town about Robby's intentions but not his hair. Interesting.

In Texas, Luke the cool cowboy takes Jo Jo to a community barbecue at the family ranch. Luke has 50 friends whooping it up on the Texan ranch, while he takes Jo Jo riding to a field where he's set up a heart-shaped group of roses to pledge his feelings for her. What is more romantic than that, as Rascal Flatts sings in the background?   Nada.
At the rose ceremony, in a cobalt mermaid dress, Jo Jo indicates Luke is going home. Inside a jet hangar, Luke asks to speak privately to Jo Jo, tells her his feelings and she breaks down on the runway, no knowing what to do. Let Robby go!!!!!!!!! Luke is the front runner. Right????
To Be Continued...

Pity Roses Turn to No Roses on The Bachelorette!

The pressure was on this week on The Bachelorette knowing two men would be eliminated and only four would take Jo Jo home to meet family--a big frickin' deal for the family whether they want to be on TV or not because ABC gets to film inside your house! They'd have to rent a clean house if either of my kids did this.
Alex gets the first one on one in Buenos Aires and off they go in an SUV as bored with each other as any people who've been married fifty years and never had anything in common in the first place. It was painful to watch! Painful to see how little chemistry they had and how big Jo Jo's yawn was.
Meanwhile the guys get on a funky bus, drink beer and compose an awesome rap wishing they were alone with Jo Jo. James, Chase, Jordan, Luke and Robby stop for mystery meat (that even the local dogs won't eat) at a roadside stand then continue on their Magic Bus journey.

Alex and Jo Jo pull in to a gorgeous country ranch/horse training center to learn to be estancias - Argentinian cowboys. The horse whisperer estancia got his horse to lie on the ground while Jo Jo and her date nestled in around the horse's head to talk and kiss. (Alex is dressed like a pancake hat-wearing goofball and Jo Jo gets to wear tight suede pants and heels!)
After cleaning off the horsey smell, Jo Jo and Alex meet for dinner and continue to have absolutely no chemistry although she tells him that it was a GREAT DAY, thereby leading him to think he was part of the great factor. Nope. She cut him loose and off he goes.
The men have checked in to a Polo Club rental house with high ceilings for all their hair and Jordan gets the next one on one. The men shoot daggers at him with their eyes.
Fresh from rejecting Alex, Jo Jo meets Jordan at an airstrip where they catch a private jet to Mendoza for wine tasting. Lots of kissing and flirting on the plane ensues and when they get to the gorgeous vineyard with the Andes Mountains in the background, they crush grapes with their feet then drink the juice, toe jam and all. A hot tub has mysteriously appeared in the middle of nowhere and Jor Jo get in to kiss, drink and talk.
We find out at dinner later that the famous quarterback, Aaron Rogers doesn't speak to Jordan or the other sibling. Aaron has no idea Jordan is on this show and probably won't until it airs. Wow! What a twist! This made everyone in the room fall in love with Jordan. Familial strife! Even though Jordan has posey lip biting expressions, he seems like a nice guy. What the heck is his real job though? And someone trim that hair or get him a hairband.

The group date is rained out so they play games in Jo Jo's hotel suite, like truth or dare, who can stuff the most fries in their mouth at once and then form a massage train. James does a bit of teasing/trash talking, especially on Robby, which is weird but Robby's extremely buffed body distracts us and probably Jo Jo because he gets the rose.

Luke has the next one on one and he gets to show Jo Jo just how sexy he is on a horse. There is a HUGE connection between these two. His hometown visit will be interesting. The cowboy is the front runner. What does he do for work??? I love what he says about his relationship with horses. Very eloquent. The date finishes without dinner and Luke returns to the Polo Club to tell everyone to get their suits and ties; it's time for the Rose Ceremony.
What?
At a building that resembles The Alamo, the men line up inside and roses are given to everyone but James. No surprise there. Off goes the cuddly singer from Texas.
Next week it's hometowns, where we think Robby's old GF might still be waiting in the wings. Or hiding under his pompadour! What's that you say? His ex was last seen this weekend on Instagram kissing Bad Chad?? Now that's revenge!

Kim Hornsby is a Bestselling Author of Suspense and Romance who lives in the Seattle area near a former Bachelor and personally knows a Bachelor and Bachelor in Paradise alumni. Her opinions are her own and not those of the dogs lying at her feet begging for treats.
Find her books on Amazon, including The Husband Hunt, a novella strangely similar to a season of The Bachelor.

Jo Jo Shocks Wells, Derek, Alex and James!

And it's off to Buenos Aires for The Bachelorette Gang where the remaining men settle in to a gorgeous suite in a historic hotel with architecture to die for --The Plaza Hotel. Buenos Aires looks absolutely gorgeous and absolutely enormous!

Wells got the one on one date with Jo Jo which was pretty funny because it alluded to kissing and Wells was the only bachelor who hadn't kissed the lovely Jo Jo yet. The men made fun of Wells' opportunity and way too much pressure was put on the boy/man to get that kiss! He looked like it was his turn to save the world.

While Wells was dodging and avoiding the kiss like someone with a lip sore, the men received their group date card back at the hotel. Everyone was on the group date like Robby, Luke, Jordan and James but not Derek and Chase, two of the front runners for Jo Jo (in my mind.) That meant that those last two would be pitted against each other in the two on one, something I thought was a production mistake when I read the date card. Why have two front runners compete against each other knowing you have to get rid of one? It didn't make sense to this Bachelor Nation member.

Wells

Back at the Wells and Jo Jo date, the twosome ended up at a performance art show where they were rolling around in four inches of water on a clear surface hovered over an audience (or was it just us with the camera?) that tipped, thereby jostling the half naked performers from one side of the see-through platform to the other. What this meant was there was loads of rubbing up against each other and wet bodies and kissing opportunities but did Wells take his cue? No. Not really. It wasn't until the jostling finished that Wells caved and kissed her after Jo Jo had thrust her lips and more his way for probably hours of filming. When they kissed, she cheered like it was the Superbowl win. After drying off and dressing in fancy clothes, they went on to have dinner in a terribly hot room with 1,000 candles, which made Wells continue to dodge, sweat and stutter. During their conversation, the nervous Ned said he didn't believe in true love, never realizing he was digging his own Bachelor grave. YOU"RE OUTTA HERE! We kinda screamed from my viewing party. Wells was not Jo Jo material and she knew it. Funny, sweet guy but not ready for prime time, if you know what I mean.

James

On the group date, the players, I mean contestants, I mean daters went to a street fair and ended up playing soccer. James, the man who lost lots of pounds of Margherita pizza to be on the show was measuring himself to the other buffed jocks and came up short but the Buenos Aires soccer GK let James' ball through the goal in what looked like a setup and he got a Jo Jo kiss. Imagine me coughing here saying "fixed" into the cough. James is too insecure for Jo Jo and at the after party James proves that in throwing his best buddy in the house, Jordan, under the bus for Jo Jo. He trash talks Jordan and Jo Jo doesn't know what to believe. She takes cool Luke aside and he goes in for the kill by kissing her passionately and grabbing her "hip." He later gets the rose, mostly for being the least afraid to kiss her. Which doesn't mean he's the best husband material but those two sure can swap spit!

Chase

The two on one with Derek and Chase is a stupid class in Tango dancing. Not that a tango class would be stupid but the producers and director REALLY missed the mark with this one, having both men pulling on Jo Jo in a fight to win her heart. The dance sequence was cringe worthy and dumb and below the intelligence level of the people who like to watch this show, like me. People who draw the line at extremely stupid but watch the show anyhow.
At dinner, Jo Jo cut Derek, the guy who looks like Jim on The Office and I was incredulous! Why keep Chase, Dudette? She must have her reasons but we have no idea. At my viewer party we all agreed that Chase must have something we couldn't all see besides his stone-faced expression that rarely smiles and big muscles.

Alex

At the rose ceremony, in a Game of Thrones type hall (where Cersei blew up Marjorie and the gang,) Jo Jo gives everyone roses but Alex and James who I think she should just put in a limo and forget about. After a tense moment asking Chris Harrison something about the rules of The Bachelor, she went back in the room and gave both men roses. This seemed like a slap in the face for Derek fans. She gave James and Alex roses?????
What was she thinking? I left the party mad at Jo Jo, vowing to not watch the following week which turned out fine because it was a rerun.

Derek

Two weeks have passed and now I've forgiven Jo Jo and am ready for the next episode even though Derek won't be appearing. I've learned that Derek has gone on to use his media fame to draw attention to a cause close to his heart--raising money for victims of domestic abuse. Now that is a classy thing to do.




Kim Hornsby is a Bestselling Author of Suspense and Romance who lives in the Seattle area near a former Bachelor and personally knows a Bachelor and Bachelor in Paradise alumni. Her opinions are her own and not those of the dogs lying at her feet begging for treats.
Find her books on Amazon, including The Husband Hunt, a novella strangely similar to a season of The Bachelor.

Jo Jo Tosses Bad Chad!

I'm feeling guilty and inadequate about not reporting in on The Bachelorette yet when I have so many readers asking me where's my blog. So here goes:











I loke Jo Jo (between love and like) She is a great Bach so far. Wears cute clothes, admits that guys are sexy hot, treats the guys well without making it seem like a harem, and has kept the hair twirling to a minimum, thank God! She also had the good sense to cut Bad Chad loose even though he made GREAT TV and was the man we loved to hate.

BAD CHAD

On Monday we got to see Bad Chad hike up to the house in the woods, scrape his nails down the glass door and wait to be let in so he could start yet another confrontation with the boys, I mean men. Chad needs to join a friendship club to learn some social skills. That or have one ball removed. He's too much! Why are the jerkiest guys so very handsome??? Why? If Chad had what I think is Derek's personality...

So Chad says that Alex (the stocky Marine) lied about him. "Now I have to go find Alex," he said. Chad, if you're reading this, please remember that if Alex turns up dead, you are the #1 suspect. Like Elsa sang in FROZEN, Let it go, let it go!

Marine Alex

Alex returns a hero and gets a cake in his face for his efforts to expel Chad. He also gets a swollen head and his nice guy demeanor is seen flying off in the PA breeze.
At the rose ceremony, Robby is metrosexually groomed, James F reads a sweet poem, Jordan has her up against the wall with kissing, and Derek still reminds me of Jim on The Office.
The Canadian heads home before he can embarrass us Canucks any more with his posturing and eh'ing all over the place. Also, James from Nashville who wrote the poem, is cut loose. WTF?? I liked him. He must've said or done something we didn't know about. Poor James!

They head to the airport and board a tiny cartoon plane to Uruguay, land of ocean and goats, it seems. I don't know about you but Uruguay was not shown in a light that made me ever want to go there. Rain, modern ugly hotel, goats (again). Someone said they had a 360 degree of the ocean from the men's suite and I'm thinking that guy needs to go back to sixth grade math. Unless the suite was on an island, they did not have that many degrees.
Jordan gets the one on one. He's a contender and definitely has Jo Jo's interest. He might be too much too fast though and that's usually the kiss of death in the game. While they swim with seals in heavy wetsuits and kiss some more, Vinny opens his own barbershop at the men's suite and even has the latest tabloid that tells of Jo Jo being involved with her old boyfriend before the show started. The guys don't understand how tabloids work (and pay!) and some believe their collective girlfriend isn't there for the right reasons. Many are upset. Remember, these guys have NOTHING to do all day but talk to each other so I'm cutting them a bit of slack. They have Stockholm Syndrome for Jo Jo.
The group date involves sand surfing until it starts to rain, then they all clean up and go for cocktails. Evan has avoided a bloody nose so far. Derek admits he's smitten, is having a tough time with no attention from Jo Jo and gets the rose, something the men find hateful. An imaginary target is drawn on Derek's back by some.
Robby gets the second one on one date and they jump off a cliff into the ocean, swim, kiss, and go to town, literally. He's a contender for Jo Jo's hand. Man, some of these guys have a lot of hair! I can't imagine the hair products in their bathrooms. Robby's date moves to a picturesque farm where it's either raining or going to rain. I believe there are goats involved.
At this point, my notes stop, either because I lost my pen or I got up to get a glass of wine and lost interest in taking notes.

Derek

What I can tell you is that Derek is a new target and the guys don't like him particularly. He's quiet, but not mean or nasty so I don't know what the big deal is. Derek takes the guys outside at the next rose ceremony to talk to them but it turns kinda sideways proving that young men can be just as catty as young women when there is a mating dance involved.

At the ceremony, Jo Jo sends home Evan, the nosebleeder, Vinny the barber and Grant. Remind me who Grant is again? Oh yes, the hunky fireman. Why him? Oh well. It's not the rest of MY life she's choosing for. Evan had the absolute best exit speech EVER! Check out my twitter to see it. www.twitter.com/kimhornsby


That's it for now. Apologies for the typos. These blogs usually take about 2-3 hours and this took 20 minutes. More next week!

Kim Hornsby is a Bestselling Author of Suspense and Romance who lives in the Seattle area and personally knows a Bachelor alumni. Her opinions are her own and not those of the dogs lying at her feet begging for treats.
Find her books on Amazon, including The Husband Hunt, a novella strangely similar to a season of The Bachelor.

Who's Off the Wedding List on The Bachelor Finale?

Ben is Engaged! To Lauren B. but it was touch and go there for an hour as Ben Higgins declared his love for two women! Yes two!!! Jo Jo and Lauren were both equally in love and guardedly sure that they might end up as Ben's fiancee because for the first time in Bachelor history, The Bachelor told women that he loved them. And that he was in love with them!

If you watched this finale you might have agreed with me at this point that saying those words is not a great idea if you are going to utter it to both remaining women. It's just plain unfair to that one lady who will be going home in tears after planning what to name the first baby.
Note to future Bachelors: Do not say the love word before the proposal. Do not. Bad idea. Even if you do love everyone. It's going to be taken the wrong way as a major hint that that girl is the ONE.

Last night's show revealed two nervous ladies, Ben in a state of turmoil over who to choose, and Neil Lane with a big confused smile. It seemed like our Bachelor was still wondering who to spend the rest of his life with until C.H. gave him a helpful hint. "Who can't you live without?"

Both ladies met Ben's parents, made great impressions, and went back to their Jamaican hotel rooms hoping to call Amy Higgins Mom, and Dave Higgins Dad in another few months.
I have to mention here that I knew without a doubt who Ben picked and having that secret info ruined the whole season for me. It's not fun to know the "winner." At all. There is no tension, game, interest in the other girls when you have the final answer.
That said, we watched both ladies dress in their finest for proposal day and then get helicoptered over to Ben and the proposal station set up by those amazing set decorators on another part of the island. At this point in the show I was shouting at Ben that he shouldn't have let Jo Jo get all dressed up. He should have done one of those hotel room let down things, especially considering all he and Jo Jo had been through and the fact that they were self-professed best friends and all. Sheesh!
But no, he let her get into her proposal outfit and nervously shake her way down a slippery stream path to find out that she wasn't the love of his life. Harsh!
Moving on...Lauren looked darling and was overjoyed to hear that she is the love of his life. Lauren B. is his person and he is hers. I wouldn't say it was the sweetest proposal in Bach history but it was nice. They looked very happy and that made me happy, even though I did not have any wine last night to help my happiness along.
After the Final Rose came next with Ben wearing a checkered suit, print tie and checked shirt. Is this the new style because he looked like a traveling roadshow barker to me? He spoke eloquently but was flustered when Jo Jo came out to say hello and tell him she's moved on. Which is good because Ben has too. With his fiancee.

It probably helped Jo Jo move on this week when The Bachelor producers switched gears and dropped Caila as the new Bachelorette in favor of Jo Jo. According to spies, they'd even shot some test footage of Caila only to decide the public wasn't thrilled with her. So, Jo Jo and her hair fiddling will be back in another four months to find herself a true love on TV. I like Jo Jo but really, really hope that hair fixing thing she does constantly gets toned down ALOT! It's annoying.
And to that critic who wrote that Caila is as interesting as a drawer full of sand, remember that The Bachelor director and editor only show us what they want us to see and she might be a real bitch or have a wild personality. Regardless, Caila was gracious on social media this morning wishing the happy couple congratulations and wishing Jo Jo a great run at the Bachelorette. Come to think of it, she might not have made great TV if she's polite and sweet. And gracious.
C.H. tried half-heartedly, to get Ben and Lauren to get hitched on camera last night, having flown in Ben's friend and pastor but no, they want friends at their wedding, Ben said. Anyone else feel like we aren't his idea of wedding guest material? I was a little insulted as a faithful standing member of Bachelor Nation who hadn't even had any wine. Looks like we are off the wedding list People.

The closing credits rolled while the Higgins family and the Bushnell family hugged it out and blended and smiled while the happy couple mingled amongst them.
I give this Bach couple a 98% chance of making it to the alter and only hold back 2% for crazy uncalled for happenings like flood or famine.
A happy ending is always great on The Bachelor, don't you agree?

The Chicken Tells All on The Bachelor!

Sheila, the little chicken from Redmond, Washington, sat quietly during The Women Tell All on The Bachelor last night, until she couldn't take it any longer. Chickens can sense liars and when she flew off owner and Bachelor contestant, Tiara Soleim's lap, it kind of said it all.
Sheila's "I'm outta here" flying escape during Olivia saying "I'm a strong, independent woman," one more time, was actually what I wanted to do at that point.
I'm pretty sure if Sheila could talk, she'd have told Olivia, "Be sure to add aggressive, competitive and insensitive, because most of these women who have left good jobs and the safety of the real world to be on this scary and possibly life-changing reality show, have the same strength and independence as you."
The best behaved chicken in Hollywood took to the ABC studio skies to hop to Lace's lap, then continued to the floor on her way to the door, the airport and ultimately the plane that brought her to Los Angeles. (Side note: Tiara flew to L.A. with Sheila who could not go under the seat in front of her and actually had to ride in cargo in the dark! What a trooper!)
Tiara then convinced her little pet to come back to her lap and listen some more to the girls' venting about what went down in the house.

Here's the thing (and Sheila knows this, I'm sure). Women love to talk, we need to vent, we have big emotions that make us say crazy things sometimes and then we make up. Sometimes we say stuff we don't REALLY mean. Not really. Especially three months later.

Like Jubilee. I love Jubilee. Love. She might have said she was the only full-black woman in the house and that might be an offensive comment to people who are half black, I don't know, but give the girl a break. She's done 4 frickin' tours of duty in the military. If she bragged about being all black and minimized your blackness, can you not just let it go? If someone said to Jaime that they were half Canadian and she said she was full Canadian, would we be talking about this?

Maybe Jubilee was hard to get along with if you lived in the house but let's move on, Ladies. You are not going to get sympathy when you speak against a woman whose family all died in Haiti, who serves in the military and cries on camera. Complicated is fine. Many people are.
And Amy Schumer went on a rant today (#InternationalWomensDay) to lambaste Chris Harrison who tried to help Jubilee be less complicated, saying that Jubilee doesn't need a romance to be an amazing woman. Amy said complicated is not a bad thing. I wonder if she was too hasty to jump on that cause.
I don't think Chris tried to say complicated won't get you a man, necessarily, but Jubilee indicated that she'd like to love openly and maybe wasn't the best personality type for this type of show where everyone competes to date the same person. Chris Harrison was trying to handle her tears in his usual bumbling, love counselor style. It wasn't a terrible thing, Amy, and I should know. I love to call out C.H.
Last night the twins were a little too verbal, Amanda had a throat problem and couldn't really speak, Lauren H said nothing, Caila looked like she'd been crying before the show, Lace redeemed herself with a gorgeous apology and Olivia still looked aggressive and bossy. (She needs one of those Hollywood coaches who tell you how to dig yourself out of bad PR.)

I actually loved this Women Tell All so much more than most but maybe that is because I know Tiara and have held that little chicken in my hands and both 'ladies' are as sweet and lovely as you'd ever want to know. I'm just hoping that Tiara and Sheila get to go to Bachelor In Paradise in a few months and we can see Sheila in her poultry bikini!
What do you think.

#SheilaforBachelorInParadise
#ChickenTellsAll

The Bachelor Breaks the Cardinal Rule!!!!

Jamaica Mon, on The Bachelor!

Ben has three women left at this point and all three women are in love with the hunky software salesman from Indiana. Or they think they are. It's my opinion that at this point they have a form of Stockholm Syndrome and are in love with the only man they've seen for months, a man who is made out to be the next James Bond and their feelings in this captivity have led them to believe they love Ben. It's clever how the producers limit their time with the Bachelor and control the women's experiances. That's why the Fantasy Suite dates are essential. They actually get to spend uninterrupted hours to find out who this guy really is. Forget the bed. The women don't have cameras in their faces, directors telling them where to stand, producers prompting them for dirt on another girl.

The first date last night was Caila and Ben's float on a raft down a river to the Jerky Center where they ate barbeque and drank from coconuts. Caila was worried and quiet and not herself and Ben sensed it. Conversation was stilted.
Later, at the dinner table, she confessed her worry about the other relationships. He basically told her to trust him so she did, and bravely revealed that she loved him. Fireworks went crazy in the background as they stood in thigh deep (probably cold) water to pose and kiss. They woke up the next morning and blissfully kissed, drank coffee, and smiled a lot, like lovers do.

Lauren's date with Ben involved releasing newborn sea turtles to the ocean, an activity I missed doing by one day recently in Nicaragua. (There were no new hatches the day I was at the turtle beach.) Lauren and Ben had loads of one day old Hawksbills to watch as they hobbled to the sea instinctively. Who wasn't moved to almost tears to see these babies head to what will probably be their early demise in the ocean. Not many make it. Not like in Finding Nemo.
That night, Lauren and Ben found a reggae band on the street and sat at the Bachelor dinner vignette to read the Fantasy Suite card. Lauren told Ben that he's the man of her dreams and also revealed that she loved him. For the first time in Bachelor history the Bachelor said it back and I almost fell off my chair and spilled my two buck Chuck. Are they allowed to say that? He did! These two seemed very much in love and I pretty much had this contest all sewn up at this point but wait...

The next day with Jo Jo went swimmingly. She wears skimpy, sexy clothes, have you noticed? Her bikini at YS Falls was strange and highlighted her assets. She and Ben swam and talked and kissed and when she revealed she loved him, Ben said he loved her too. Jo Jo's mouth feel open. WHAT? She took this to mean that she is the ONE, I was pretty sure, and fell the rest of the way in love with Ben. Isn't this the Bachelor Cardinal Rule #1? Do not say those love words until your propose to that one girl at the very end??? Whether the show's psychologist warned Ben or not, we'll never know.

The Fantasy Suite card presented itself at dinner and off they went to the Romeo and Juliet room for privacy. In the morning, they fed each other fruit, declared their love for each other and off Ben went to ponder what to do after telling two women that he loves them. He forgot to tell Caila that he loves her! But wait. He doesn't exactly.
When Caila decided to surprise him with a visit to his guest house on the other side of the island, he sat her down on the cold hard stairs outside his suite and delivered the cold, hard truth. She had to leave. She started to, then got out of the car to ask him when he knew he wasn't in love with her. Good move, Caila! She got a satisfactory answer and cried all the way to the airport.
At the rose ceremony sisterwives Lauren and Jo Jo wondered where Caila got to until Ben arrived to say he'd sent her home. They toasted awkwardly, group hugged awkwardly, and tried to smile even though all three of them knew that one of them would be crying their eyes out in the next few days. Well, maybe two of them. Ben is a soft-hearted guy.

The Women Tell All was filmed Saturday night in Los Angeles and the Chicken Enthusiast was invited to attend--and Sheila, the little chicken who she loves. Sheila had to fly cargo, unlike a tiny dog who can go under the seat in front but the little chicken handled her trip to Hollywood like a trooper. Tiara, the chicken enthusiast had never been more proud of a chicken in her life. Sheila was held by Chris Harrison and Elan Gale for selfies, got on-camera time and even squawked at an appropriate moment during the taping. We aren't sure if Tiara will get edited out but the fact that they invited someone who was let go the first night, was an exciting honor for our girl from Washington State.
Tune in Monday to see if Sheila the chicken gets air time, if they cut away to Tiara's mid-riff showing outfit or if they call out Leah for lying about throwing Lauren B under the bus!

Tears and Orthopedics on The Bachelor

Monday night on The Bachelor, we followed Ben Higgins to Warsaw Indiana, the orthopedic capital. I'd always wondered where that was and now I know!
Warsaw looked postcard pretty and so much more interesting than Chris Soules' town with five buildings, and one of them shut down. I'd move to Warsaw!

Autumn in Indiana looks very picturesque and both my hubby and I wondered if those amazing Bachelor set designers scattered red and gold leaves everywhere to make the town look so pretty.

Ben picked up the few girls left in his family's party boat and drove them around the large lake to their rented house, which was apparently just down the shoreline from the Higgins' family digs.

The first date was a one on one and Ben grabbed Lauren from the group of girls on the couch to tour the town in a quaint old red truck. Unlike my tour of Hubby's hometown 24 years ago where he pointed out all the places he got in trouble, Ben took Lauren to where he volunteers time to an after school kids' program. The kids remembered him even though he now lives in Colorado and has a real job. Very cute. Two Indiana NBA stars joined them for basketball and Lauren fit in like she grew up in the Orthopedic capital.

When the sun set, they ended up in matching jeans and leather jackets at Ben's old apartment, I believe he said. A moment to clear the air about Lauren's commitment to Ben, had them smooching and all was well in Ben/Lauren world.
Back at the house though, tears flowed from the girls left behind. "Why am I here if I don't get a one on one?" This is the type of thinking that can lead a contender straight to the Limo for One, if you're not careful. Sheesh! Lasting relationships take time to grow. Five weeks to be exact.

Ben and Jo Jo had a date the next day and drove to Chicago, (really close to Warsaw) to visit Wrigley Field, home of the Cubs, Ben's favorite sports team. They played a bit of baseball, hung out on the grass, tried to eat a romantic dinner on the mound and we never heard any references to Ben trying to get to third base with Jo Jo.


The group date next day was a fun/morose jaunt to a picturesque farm where Becca, Amanda and Caila coupled up and tried to row boats on the farm's pond. Becca and Caila were too distracted with Ben in the other boat to figure out how to row. Then, they went in the barn where the set designers had made a barn look prettier than it had a right to and I was sure Becca had a terrible flashback of another Bachelor barn where her heart was broken by Chris Soules. She looked a bit traumatized, especially when the rose went to Amanda.

Off went Ben and Caila on the second half of the date that included a town carnival where the mayor declared Ben a town treasure and Amanda declared Ben a french frie stealer. (Another McDonald's ad!)

Emily got the last one on one date and was thrilled to get her alone time with the tall hunk. They took off in the party boat and docked at Ben's family home where Emily proceeded to dig herself deeper and deeper into the "I'm too young to get married" hole. She actually said that she'd always wanted to be an NFL cheerleader to Ben's parents like there was still plenty of time to chase her dream. Which there is, but not with Ben and he had to cut her loose after the date. I happen to think Emily is a sweet kid but she's a kid, still. She had to ask if the birds on the lake were swans. Endearing, but not wife material for Ben.
More tears ensued when she packed, left and got in the Limo for One.

 The girls proceeded to get ready for a chilly rose ceremony amongst the red and gold maple leaves on the county courthouse lawn in Warsaw.
Coats were in order, probably something most of the girls didn't foresee needing to wear over a sexy cocktail dress. Becca did not make the cut and was a bit snarky over him "blindsiding" her. Hey, Becca. Blindsiding is when you don't see it coming and you spent most of this episode talking about how you'd probably get cut.



Next week is hometowns and it looks like the mean brother syndrome rears its ugly head at JoJo's. Oh Oh!

Bachelor at 20 and a Wedding!

THE BACHELOR celebrated its 20th season with a Sunday night special edition/look back at twenty shows and it was actually pretty good!
I'm going to make this short and just give a quick overview of the show seeing I did not take notes while watching. Hey, I'd just finished an 8-hour shift at Macy's and simply wanted to sit on the couch, eat something with melted cheese on top and drink a Coors Lite.
The show paid tribute to Bachelor Nation, the fan base that keeps the show on the air. Yes, you. We watched clips from earlier Bachelor shows, including the first one with Alex Michel and a bevy of ladies who looked a whole lot more real and less Hollywoodized than the ladies have in recent shows. Nowadays one must visit the nail salon, the tanning salon, the hair salon, the gym, the dentist, the MAC makeup counter and then get some hot shot designer to sponsor your clothes on the show.

It was fun to see loads of former Bachelors in one room with their wives (Andrew Firestone has three kids!), fiancees (Bob Guinney and Jessica, my neighbors), girlfriends (?), or lack thereof (Chris Soules is still alone, apparently). It seems the Bachelorettes have fared better at finding love. At the party we saw Kaitlyn and Shawn, Trista and Ryan, Deanna and hubby, Ashley and J.P. and Andy Dorfman and no one. There were also many pregnant, (engaged!) alumni like Ashley Salter, Ali Feditowski, and the tiara-wearing Diva who is one of Chris Harrison's favorite Bachelor people. (What?) Other alumni who attended were Sarah Herron, Chris Bukowski, Ashley the crier, Juelia, Jared, and more.
They showed outtakes, had funny little segments like "Worst Villain" clips and the show was thoroughly entertaining to this Bachelor groupie.
Then, we switched to another gathering, one that happened recently, to celebrate Jade and Tanner's wedding. I know these two events took place separately because Jason Mesnick and Molly couldn't come to the 20th party but Jason was at the wedding. Molly was home with the baby in rainy Seattle.

Chris Harrison interviewed alumni with the empty wedding scene as the backdrop, and for once, he did a pretty good job with ad lib. CH is becoming the king of Schmaltz and said "Never before in Bachelor history," so many times over the two hours, I forgot to count.

I really like Jade and Tanner's story and was very happy to see them fall in love on Bachelor in Paradise. I was hoping they'd make it past the afterlife when the show ended and was worried their relationship wouldn't survive. Last night they looked absolutely radiant and thrilled as they vowed to love each other forever in one of the nicest wedding ceremonies in Bachelor History. The vows were heartfelt, Jade looked absolutely gorgeous, and the flowers! Did anyone notice that flower wall Jade passed as she came off the staircase? The audience was filled with alumni, most crying after the vows and it was a beautiful ceremony with CH officiating.
The reception was a staged filming of more Bach alumni including Jillian Harris, Deanna, Andi, Michelle Money, Ben, Chris Soules, and Seal. Yes, Seal sang at the reception and did a wonderful job. The guy who sang at the ceremony Matt Nathanson was a little loud and it was a welcome change when Carly from Bachelor in Paradise sang a pretty song she wrote for the happy couple.
All in all, last night's show was fun to watch and I'm sure more than a few hookups occurred at the Dana Point La Di Da Hotel. And isn't that what The Bachelor is all about?
No, not hooking up! Love.