Why Women Love "The Bachelor" on ABC

These next words are only my opinion and not the opinion of the dogs who lie snoring beside me.

The Bachelor. America's mindless phenomenon. I watch it faithfully and my sister, who is the smart one in our family can't get enough of the reality TV show that appears, blessedly, on Monday nights- which is a good night after a weekend, because it gives us something to look forward to after getting up for work on Monday, right? But, The Bachelor comes only twice a year and we have to wait and wait between shows, forced to watch Dancing with The Stars because now the last Bachelor Sean Lowe has joined the dancing reality show to get enough money to buy a house or something like that. We only get to see our beloved Bachelor show half of the nights out of the year. Damned. Can't they produce more shows? Come on ABC. And now Bachelor Pad (which was a terrible cross between The Bachelor and a hedonistic semi-porn game show) is not filming this year for our summer enjoyment. What's a viewer to do?
The Bachelor and The Bachelorette are wildly popular TV reality shows. Wildly. Just see how many followers Chris Harrison has on Twitter. Or join Bachelor Nation on FB or twitter. Why is there such appeal to intelligent women who have high stress jobs, who manage families, have been married for twenty years, or even young women who are looking for love? The Bachelor is not just for women either. Even men watch this show, with no worries about how others will gauge their masculinity. (My husband gets a beer and sits himself in front of the TV for The Bachelor, calling out opinions on what he thinks the guys should do or should not do-he loves it!).

ABC's The Bachelor is watched by all age groups, demographics and genders. The Bachelorette, its sister show  is equally popular. If you don't watch the show or have never heard of it (where have you been living? In a cave in Borneo?) the young woman chooses between twenty-five single men, as opposed to The Bachelor where  one man chooses between twenty-five single women. As a nation, we love to watch the drama of a villain among the seemingly nice contestants,(Tiara) the horror of a fan favorite not getting a rose, (Lindsey) or the unthinkable of the mean girl getting proposed to (Courtney).
Why do we tune in every Monday night ( in droves) to watch someone whittle the list down to one hopeful candidate for a lasting relationship? It is mindless FUN, that's why. If love makes the world go 'round, and what the world needs now is love, sweet love, then the quest for love and partnering up is very important in our lives. Maybe the most important thing we, as human beings, have. And watching someone on their quest of this is voyeurism at its finest. We get to see someone during the dating process and it's only rated PG. We are not peeking in on anything that would be considered naughty or twisted. We are simply watching a person doing the most normal human thing possible-look for love.

As someone who's been married twenty-one years, I have two thoughts on why my husband and I sit down on Monday nights to ravage every second of this show like the characters were beloved relatives/friends who we care deeply about. One, is that we are past the initial romantic buzz of our relationship and have long been in the comfortable, I love- you- no- matter- what stage and watching someone who's jazzed on that initial attraction brings back memories and emotions we haven't felt in a long time. And two, is that after a long day with teenagers, chores, work, the dog chewing a hole in the dry wall, stress, we just want to watch something that's entertaining and makes us feel happy without investing too much emotion. After the Rose Ceremony and our favorite is eliminated, we don't go around all week mourning the event. We simply pick a new favorite. Isn't that lovely and so unlike real life when a boyfriend dumps you and you spend three months wondering where you went wrong? We walk away at the end of the show, commiserate on what the problem was and go to bed, our psyches only slightly affected by the bachelor's rejection of our favorite contestant.
If you're an avid fan of the reality show franchise, you know that groups congregate all around the country on Monday nights to watch the show, in neighborhoods, sororities, bars and girlfriend's houses. The Bachelor has become a cultural phenomenon. Tabloid magazines carry the latest news on the contestants, and opinions breed like bunnies on what's going to happen as the road to the Final Rose gets twisty .

After the proposal on national TV, the media heyday begins and the remaining lovey-dovey couple, barely has a chance of surviving as dirt is dug up, pictures of the individuals drinking shots off another girls' abdomen surface and the media struggles to tear the young love birds apart. Very few have survived the onslaught. Ryan and Trista come to mind, and so far Jason and Molly but remember, he originally chose someone else and broke up with his chosen one to go back to get his heartbroken Molly. As a nation we yearn for a happy couple but also can't resist what the media has found against them. Dang.
Emily and Jef didn't have a chance, especially if she was texting another man. The press dove on that one like a hungry tiger and then it was all over before it even got very far off the ground. I wanted that to work. What about you? They seemed perfect for each other. What the heck happened there? They were cute and full of benevolent aspirations, as well as love for each other. As much as I cheered them on and cringed at Ari's advancement as the weeks went on, I didn't shed any tears over the breakup and that's what I'm talking about. All the buzz without the investment. Or at least some of the buzz without actually kissing anyone who's not your husband.
I'm not entirely sure why everyone watches The Bachelor. Unless you are like me. Life is tough (as my mother used to say when I was a carefree teen), and there is so much stress and so many obstacles to overcome on a daily basis. To simply plant oneself in front of the boob tube for one hour a week and listen in on someone's quest for love is a blessed event. Especially if everyone is dressed to the nines, showing off a little skin here and there, kissing and flirting in romantic locations, and it's a game we can play at home. And it's free TV. Not cable. Ongoing TV, something you can count on twice a year for Monday night entertainment. It's love and we all know - Love is All You Need. The Beatles told us this. Tra La La

Over and Out

Kim Hornsby is the author of the short novella The Husband Hunt, available on Amazon books for Kindle or download. It's a two hour read similar to watching The Bachelor and The Husband Hunt 2- Kat's Season
She's also the author of the novel The Dream Jumper's Promise, nominated for BEST INDIE FIRST BOOK (click on the cover above) or http://amzn.com/B00AA4FAJC
and Necessary Detour, published with The Wild Rose Press. http://amzn.com/B00AU50M76
Both novels are Romantic Women's Fiction with strong elements of Suspense

Hometowning Eliminates DES!

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo! Not Des?! The Katie Holmes lookalike is gone, sent packing.
ean Lowe said last night on The Bachelor that he wasn't sure he was making a great decision but after the brother calling him a playboy, he just couldn't see himself fitting in with that family. Thanks Bro for ruining Des's life!
In the episode that aired last night, Sean first went to meet AshLee's parents, knowing that AshLee is madly in love with him, this is it, never before has anyone been able to get inside her guarded heart who isn't her family. AshLee is so ready for Sean to say I love you, that it hurts when he doesn't. It's going to kill us if he doesn't pick her. Forget AshLee, we will hurt for weeks.
The parents were lovely, the father recounted the moment he met AshLee who was a 4 year old girl in a foster home and I tell you, I had a tear in my eye. It was a touching story. Sean hit it off with the folks in a Christian values sort of way and then went to Seattle to throw fish at Pike Street market with Catherine. They had tons of good fun but when Catherine's sisters put a damper on the 'is she ready for kids' question, Sean was surprised. Sure, Catherine is fun and gorgeous and wonderful but is she ready to settle down and put an apron on? Maybe not. Next Sean met the 2 star general who ended up being very approachable and gave Sean permission to propose to his daughter if it ended up that way. Sean and Lindsay did lots more smooching and pushing frosted cupcakes into each other's faces and no one called him a playboy. The last stop was Des's house where things were going only okay until her brother took Sean outside for a talk and quickly dumped a pail of water on the nice little bonfire of love between Des and Sean. So much for family Christmases and going for beers with the bro in law. Sean was officially insulted and freaked out and left early. Wimp.
I think the reason Sean was so undecided about who to let go at the rose ceremony, besides the fact that he's falling in love with 4 women and ready to take things to the next level and all that Bachelor talk, is that he gave up on Des so quickly. He didn't fight for her or his right to not be a playboy. In this instance the takeaway (known in sales tactics) did not work. Sean Lowe walked away without talking it out with Des. Not fair.
Tonight we get to see real time (sort of) Sean tell us his thoughts on what's aired so far. Thought of Tierra will be in there and that's always interesting when they finally get to see their 'girlfriend' being nasty and mean.
You gotta know Tierra is being courted right now by producers to do Bachelor Pad this summer. I'm sure those smooth talking prods are saying 'it's a chance to show America who you really are'. And speaking of spin off shows, I have a great idea: Bachelor Villains Dating Show. All the former stupid contestants who said horrible things to the camera during their stint on The Bachelor get to come back and do a dating show. Oh wait, that's kind of Bachelor Pad if you added in some nice ones. Well, you see where I'm going with this and it could be called The Bachevil.
Just sayin'
Kim

Bye Bye Tierra

She's gone. Tierra has left the building. It took Sean's sister flying all the way to St. Croix to get him to realize that the girl who doesn't get along with the other girls is the red flag. Basically all that matters is that he finally put her out of her misery.
I agree with Sean. She was unhappy in that Bachelor setting. Not used to sharing, not used to having her 'sparkle' dimmed. Now Tierra can go wherever she needs to go to have her sparkle recharged. I have to stop and formally thank that girl for talking about her sparkle because it was just so priceless after all the drama and fighting in the house brought on by her. Sparkle = Catty Mean Girl
As I watched The Bachelor last night I wondered what Sean thought while watching at his home, when it took him all these episodes to see that the girl who fell up the stairs, suffered from hypothermia and was at the center of all the strife in the house was not going to be a good wife or mother to his children. When his sister Shay arrived and reminded him that he'd vowed to watch out for the girl  who doesn't get along with the other girls, I almost cried with relief. I so want Sean to end up with someone. He is not a Hollywood player, not yet. And if he gets out while he still can, he may never turn out to be on another reality show or have a sponsorship deal with a product, or attend another Bachelor reunion party to hook up with former contestants in a boozy show of Bachelor love. Sean deserves, from what I've seen, to go quietly into the night with his true love (AshLee) and disappear. To never grace the cover of US magazine.
From what we see of future episodes, Des's brother pretty much threatens to finish off Sean and his Hollywood ways so I'll go out on a limb here and say she'll be gone after next week. Catherine gets very little air time so she might be a big reveal as one of the last two. The producers love to edit the show with an 'out of nowhere' finish. But it also looked like while Sean waits to propose at that last moment, something unusual happens, someone doesn't arrive, (maybe this is Des's boyfriend finally showing up) or someone comes back. (Please stay home Tierra, you have years of therapy coming your way after this). And Lindsay, who has been a patient cutie pie since she first showed up in a wedding dress, well I'm not sure what to say. They sure do like to kiss each other but is that enough to base a lifetime of wedded bliss on? The other gal sent home last night was Lesley. The camera showed very little of their date, not much of her departure and moved on quickly. She just couldn't give enough of herself to Sean until she affirmed she would be the last girl standing. Thus, the conundrum of the Bachelor. You must love 'til you hurt and then really get devastated when he picks someone else.
Next week is Hometowns. Always fun. Looks like the siblings throw some curve balls into the dreams of several girls and Lindsay's 2 star general dad might be a stinker. Tune in next week for more drama --stuff never seen before in Bachelor history.
In the meantime, check out my free Romantic Suspense Necessary Detour on Amazon Kindle!
http://amzn.com/B00AU50M76  Former Rock Star Goldy can't stop spying on the neighbors to save her own life!
Or click on The Dream Jumper's Promise at the top right of this post. That one is only .99 today!

What do you think about Sean's choices? Who's your pick?

The Bachelor Gets Duped by Producers- Again!

They are very clever over there at The Bachelor. By now, the producers know what sells and drama is #1 on their wish list. This season, Sean's quest to find that forever woman, Tierra is providing the drama and making the producers giddy with excitement. She is providing enough fodder for two shows- the Bachelor and Evil Dating Woman ( a new reality show I just thought up). Why, in god's name, would anyone in their right mind brag to the camera about how clever they are about dating and winning competitions if they've watched past Bachelor shows and have seen what a social death wish it is for the evil contestant? Look at Michelle Money who later came back on the Bachelor Pad and spent the whole summer trying to prove she was a nice person. Look at Courtney who broke up with Ben and went on to date Ari. You think she's not living down an evil reputation in her every day life. Oh yes she is. Just ask Brad Womack who was supposedly in intensive therapy for years after he did chose a woman in the final episode and later broke up with sweet Emily (who might not be all that sweet if she can't hold onto Jef).
Check out my novella on Amazon: The Husband Hunt http://amzn.com/B00BN1YNS0
It's about a reality dating show and can be read in one hour! Now back to my blog about this.
Being the evil dater women is not good in Bachelorville. Someone tell Tierra. Unless she's going for that roller derby job, and I seriously think so seeing she snubbed funny Lindsay last night on the derby remark, T is doomed for dislike. Did anyone see how the editors cut the skating piece last night to look like T was pushing gals all over the rink and even caused an injury? And now, what we are most looking forward to when they go to Banff or wherever all that ice and snow was, it looks like T runs out onto the ice, gets really cold and it makes her mascara run down her face in emergency proportions. See, I can't say anything nice about her at this point because of her camera bragging?
On the other hand, shame on Sean for choosing roller derby action just because he wanted to see some catty girl fight action. Shame. And shame on him for picking Sara, the lovely woman with only one arm, to go on that date. And shame on the producers for talking him into that. There is a lot of shame going around that Bachelor set this morning.
Front runners for me: I like Ashley for Sean. She's sweet, maybe too sweet for him after that roller derby activity and giving Leslie M diamonds, treating her like a princess and promptly dumping her before they even heard James Taylor's son sing one measly song.
And even though I am not sold on Sean as a sexy bachelor, I will be watching next week to see Tierra's makeup run to her chin in the snow. And isn't that what those shameful producers want?
Check out my soon to be bestselling novel on Amazon NECESSARY DETOUR about a rock star who retires and can't avoid danger to save her own life. http://amzn.com/B00AU50M76
It's holding at #22 on Amazon Suspense!!!