But, as seen on The Bachelor's The Women Tell All last night, I think we can also agree that the women were collectively upset that J.P. did not get to know most of them, nor did he care to. He was congenial, polite and fun to look at. They wanted more.
As Chris Harrison said, Juan Pablo had his favorites and did not pursue the others. Was he on the show to meet and marry the love of his life? Who knows? We only get to see what the director of the show wants us to see.
Regardless of his intentions, Juan Pablo has proven to be a controversial Bachelor if only for his inability to filter his thoughts in front of the camera. He's been misinterpreted in his views of gay relationships, has played favorites on the show and even told the outspoken attorney, Andi Dorfman, that she barely made the cut to the final three women. To add to that he also mentioned to her his overnight date with Clare, something that makes Andi steaming mad. Juan Pablo may be immature in some ways, insensitive in others, and an opportunist, but he's also easy going, a good sport and sympathetic. He's done well for The Bachelor franchise with his pecs and six pack, his Latin accent, and undeniably attractive athleticism. All physical attributes, yes, but remember, this is not the History Channel. There's a reason we watched every week and it wasn't for the amazing conversations.
Judging from the witch hunt last night, here's some bones of contention with the ladies:
He had a strange sense of fair. When it came to kissing, he tried to resist kissing them all and those who he was able to resist, he told them he was abstaining because of his daughter. That didn't sit well.
My take: He kissed who he wanted. Renee waited for that first kiss because she's a mother, which J.P. explained last night is something he holds in a very high regard. If he really liked you, he kissed you, ladies. Move on.
He took Clare off to the hot tub during a group date, thereby showing disrespect to the ones left behind. If you know how this show works, there are huge clumps of time where the technicians set up for certain shots and the girls have to sit around amusing themselves. Filming a show like this takes a lot of time, logistics, and has the 'Talent' waiting for hours each day. This is why actors have fancy trailers where they can knit and keep busy while the show works on camera angles, lighting and arranges the set. To have two people gone for an hour might have been disrespectful to the other girls but this is the nature of The Bachelor. He's going to like some girls more than others. If that hurts your feelings, what are you doing on a reality show competing for the attention of one man amongst 25 women?
My take: Yes, he was disrespectful and zeroed in on Clare a lot.
He went 'swimming' with Clare and no one knew she'd snuck out, not even her roommates.
Surprisingly, the ladies did not talk much about Clare being sneaky. As a matter of fact, they mostly stood up for her saying if J.P. had zeroed in on them like that, they would have done the same thing. Taking it back the next morning left Clare feeling cheap but if she hadn't started crying (something that always makes J.P. go into Daddy-mode), the incident might have blown over without a lot of fuss.
My take: What the Bachelor was trying to say to Clare was that he has no willpower where she's concerned and he needs her to be mindful of Camila because he can't do it.
Kelli was upset last night. She brought up J.P.'s comments on having a Gay Bachelor someday. Apparently she has a gay parent and took offense at the use of the word "perverted." For anyone who doesn't have a dictionary, perverse means to "deviate from conventional behavior". Society has changed it's meaning to include sexual deviants but in a broad definition anything that isn't conventional can be called perverted. Talk about lost in the translation! This comment and those tears coming from the girl who said she bet Clare had swallowed lots bigger stuff than a little piece of octopus, on national T.V. And now she's all over social media making fun of Juan Pablo's accent. She and Andi Dorfman.
My take: Girls can be mean. Unless he intentionally hurt you, be quiet. And shut up Victoria who was so drunk on her last night on the show, she should never have come back for Women Tell All. Don't try to tell the viewing public that J.P. has no problem with the language. That's called diverting attention from yourself to gain allies. Watch House of Cards.
Juan Pablo bragged in private with Andi on their fantasy suite date. Men brag. J.P. is doing M&M commercials, Muppet Movie commercials, has the media's attention. So he's braggy and likes to name drop. Stand up and walk out, Andi, say he's not the man for you. Don't make faces about how awful he is. The media goes nuts with every little thing while THE BACHELOR is running on T.V. The perverted incident and Andi's character assassination were both blown out of proportion. To the left is a picture of Juan Pablo and his ex girlfriend, the mother of his daughter, reading what US magazine has concocted about their relationship. I'm sure it was not good.
My take: The media can ruin a career, make or break a person and I don't think anything should be said lightly on national T.V.
He didn't ask the women about themselves. Basically, he wasn't interested and doesn't have enough Bachelor smarts to know he should've pretended to be interested or he'd be raked over the coals in women tell all.
He said "It's Okay" a lot. If I spoke Spanish I might say "Mucho Bueno" a lot too.
My take: Andi, you do a thing with your mouth a lot and you don't see me telling you to stop it or I'm going to strangle you. Chill pill in order. And stop teasing him on social media. It's mean.
Once again, Sharleen tried to assume her superiority over the whole show by not taking back her comment about wishing she was dumber, thereby insulting all the other ladies on the show, as well as Juan Pablo. Oh, Sharleen, I bet you were a real nerd in school.
What's going to happen next week? If Juan Pablo went into this unique, coveted, and difficult situation of being the next Bachelor on the premise that it would further his career and he might get a girlfriend out of it, that sounds about right. The girls have ulterior motives too, believe it or not. Here's Nurse Nikki not looking like a nurse.
When you really think about it, is this T.V. reality show the best way to meet women and find someone who loves you for who you really are? If you answered yes, read on. Look back at past Bachelors and tell me that no one else has gone on the show with ulterior motives--the prince who had a home shopping business empire, the British Guy who wanted a green card, the comedian who ended up marrying and divorcing the soap opera star, the vintners, the Texan who was on twice, and on and on.
Sean Lowe and Jason Meznick are unique examples of Bachelors who were actually looking to meet the love of their life, but remember how Jason ended up with Molly after initially choosing Melissa?
Next week The Bachelor airs from St. Lucia, where Juan Pablo, Clare and Nikki have time to get to know each other better. After fantasy dates and meeting his family, both girls end up crying in their respective hotel rooms as their boyfriend walks solitarily up a jungly hill in a tuxedo.
My take: I'm thinking we might not have our happy ending with this one. Judging by the tears next week, maybe true love is not found. If Juan Pablo doesn't ask one of them their favorite color, their religion, and where they went to school, the whole thing might signal he's just not that into either, and The Bachelor will blow up in everyone's face.
Regardless of Juan Pablo's agenda and the final outcome, let's give him a break, shall we? Just because we have a taste of Bachelor Love ending in a wedding (Sean and Catherine) remember that most people go on the show for adventure, free trips, free booze, and exposure on TV for a career, not to mention the alumni cruises and parties afterwards.
Not everyone is innocently looking for love.
Kim Hornsby is the bestselling author of The Dream Jumper's Promise, a romantic suspense novel, set in Hawaii that has almost 200 reviews on Amazon. A download is 0.99 and includes a recipe for teriyaki chicken with mango salsa.
Kim also publishes short novellas based on The Bachelor, called THE HUSBAND HUNT, free for download on Amazon Books.