Thursday, October 30, 2014

Renee Zellweger Has Lost Her Face

Renee Zellweger looks different than she did ten years ago. For one thing she's older and gravity does nasty things to a face. I know. For another, she may have had plastic surgery. Also she's not smiling the wide squinty-eyed grin that's made her famous. These days, she's closing her mouth and pursing it in that sour patch look that's also famous. I bet if she smiled, we'd recognize her again.

The reason we are all aghast at these new photos of America's darling is that it does not look like her. We stare at the photos and can see some similarities, like an impersonator, but there's not enough of Renee Zellweger there to help us make a positive identification. No. Sorry. It might be her, but we're just not sure. She'd need to say something like "You had me at hello," for us to be able to stop staring.

Russell Brand has a viral video making the rounds to tell us to stop obsessing on this and in theory that idea sounds about right. Except we want to know why we can't recognize an actress we were previously very familiar with. Why? What is it?
What Russell doesn't understand ( and maybe it's because he's a man, or mannish) is that we aren't abhorred because she looks awful. The woman in the picture is very pretty. Glamorous even. We are staring because we can't put our finger on exactly what is different, except maybe that he hair is swept to the side.
I, myself, took every facial feature and compared them. The nose is the same, the chin the same, the mouth, similar, even the eyes are almost the same. Maybe she had work done but would that make a person look almost unrecognizable? I guess. One account says she had some nip tuck action to get more/better movie roles. She hasn't had a big hit since Bridget Jones' Diary. And now she's dating this dude who has those numbers after his name like Bob Jones III, as if he's more important than the original Bob. I don't know. See how this has me riled up? What happened to Renee's darling face?

Of course she's older and no one knows better than me how that takes its toll on a face but even Kim Novak in her plasticized face on the Oscars last year looked like Kim Novak. The last time I saw someone look totally unlike themselves was Ivana Trump and still, she was recognizable.

Frances McDormand is speaking out these days about embracing her new old face with all it's wrinkles and character but then her new role is that of curmudgeonly Olive Kitteridge the Pulitzer Prize winning novel. Note: Frances and I are the same age and I'm going to try to embrace my new old face too. Really, I'm going to try.

So Russell Brand, forgive us but I'm sure there's some anthropological reason why we need to know what's different about Renee and why we care so much. Maybe in caveman days if someone returned from the hunt with a different looking face, it was a warning that they were going to bludgeon us to death in our sleeps and we all have that warning built in. I don't know.
And Renee is just not looking like Renee Zellweger at all. Just like this pic of her on the movie set this week in a brown wig. It's freaky how non-Renee Zellweger she looks. I bet even Kenny Chesney doesn't recognize her even though he was only married to the actress for about a week. What is it?

Anyone want to weigh in?

Kim Hornsby is an Amazon Bestselling Author of Suspense Novels and when she isn't writing seriously, she's narcissistically blogging.

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