Jo Jo Closes Up Like a Clam at Low Tide!

Last night's Bachelorette began with the airport hangar rose ceremony, the jet supposedly idling while Jo Jo picked which three men would accompany her to the next destination.

Luke, Robby, Chase and Jordan stood nervously waiting. Then Luke asked to speak to Jo Jo, declaring his feelings (which we were pretty sure he already did!!!) but his words didn't sway the lovely brunette/blonde. Luke walked off in a fog of confusion and heartbreak.


Thailand was the next stop on their itinerary and the first date was with Robby who appeared to be a front runner. It's my opinion that declaring your undying devotion very early  to Jo Jo carried a lot of weight with her. The twosome wandered a market in the seaside town of Hua Hin, then got caught in a thunder storm where they ducked inside for foot massages. What's Robby do for work? Anyways, Jo Jo is smitten with the hunky swimmer so I steeled myself for an imminent engagement to the poof-ball haired contender. At dinner, they were given a date card and key to the fantasy suite and were off to privacy without the cameras in your face 24/7.
That's the real excitement for these couples, not the prospect of getting naked.
Jordan's date was next and Jo Jo switched gears well. I was hoping there was at least one day between leaving Robby in a mass of tangled sheets and kissing Jordan on a Thai beach. Jor Jo sweated their way uphill to a viewpoint where Jordan hoped that he and Jo were writing their love story and Jo Jo wondered if this guy was too good to be true. After washing off all the sweat of the day (it's 105 degrees in Thailand with 100% humidity) dinner in a candlelit outdoor setting had Jo Jo grilling Jordan on what the next year would look like for them.
The quarterback was dodgy but said that whatever happened, they'd do it together. Is he still playing football? Off JorJo went to the fantasy suite where Jo Jo lay across a bed and Jordan closed the door on the cameras.
Chase drove up on a scooter and Jo Jo took him on a ponga ride until they landed on a private beach. More sweat fell until they got in the water and made out. Chase is big and strong. He can lift Jo Jo easily. At times Chase looks like he could model for Romance novel book covers. Between the beach portion of the date and dinner, while Jo Jo was back at her hotel room, Robby visited Jo Jo there while Chase played with sand outside Jo Jo's window. Or was this another day? The timeline didn't add up because at dinner with Chase, Jo Jo had hair down and wore a different dress.???
Chase was playful and forthcoming and Jo Jo began to close like a clam that senses low tide. When they got to the fantasy suite and Chase declared his depth of feeling, Jo Jo's face fell and she cut the young hunk loose. I was glad to see him react honestly when he said that as soon as he declared his love she said "Get the F___ out." Chase lashed out. Why did Jo Jo let things get so far? Don't take the guy to the fantasy suite, Girlfriend!
Chase was raw and real in the vehicle as he drove away from the fantasy suite (which looked more like a condo on the Jersey shore.)
At the sweatfest of a rose ceremony, Chris Harrison, who asked Jo Jo "how you doin'" twice!!!! greeted the two men and Jo Jo. By the time Jo Jo got in front of the men to explain that she had to let Chase go, Jordan's shirt was dripping sweat and Robby's armpits were drenched. In a surprising move to shock Bachelor Nation, Chase showed up to apologize for his anger and as he walked away, a (probably female) monkey who appreciates the strong silent type followed him.
Jo Jo toasted the two men remaining, suggesting she's in love with both, making Jordan look understandably uncomfortable. She suggests a group hug, didn't get it and a monkey scratched his ear with his foot on a rooftop behind them.

Tonight is The Men Tell All, with Bad Chad looking like he's going to beat up everyone after the show and next week is the finale with Jo Jo introducing both men to her family, crying a lot and not knowing who to choose. I'm not looking forward to all the crying. Just saying.

Kim Hornsby is a Bestselling Author of Suspense and Romance who lives in the Seattle area near a former Bachelor and personally knows a Bachelor and Bachelor in Paradise alumni. Her opinions are her own and not those of the dogs lying at her feet begging for treats.
Find her books on AMAZON, including The Husband Hunt, a novella strangely similar to a season of The Bachelor.

Jo Jo Shocks Wells, Derek, Alex and James!

And it's off to Buenos Aires for The Bachelorette Gang where the remaining men settle in to a gorgeous suite in a historic hotel with architecture to die for --The Plaza Hotel. Buenos Aires looks absolutely gorgeous and absolutely enormous!

Wells got the one on one date with Jo Jo which was pretty funny because it alluded to kissing and Wells was the only bachelor who hadn't kissed the lovely Jo Jo yet. The men made fun of Wells' opportunity and way too much pressure was put on the boy/man to get that kiss! He looked like it was his turn to save the world.

While Wells was dodging and avoiding the kiss like someone with a lip sore, the men received their group date card back at the hotel. Everyone was on the group date like Robby, Luke, Jordan and James but not Derek and Chase, two of the front runners for Jo Jo (in my mind.) That meant that those last two would be pitted against each other in the two on one, something I thought was a production mistake when I read the date card. Why have two front runners compete against each other knowing you have to get rid of one? It didn't make sense to this Bachelor Nation member.

Wells

Back at the Wells and Jo Jo date, the twosome ended up at a performance art show where they were rolling around in four inches of water on a clear surface hovered over an audience (or was it just us with the camera?) that tipped, thereby jostling the half naked performers from one side of the see-through platform to the other. What this meant was there was loads of rubbing up against each other and wet bodies and kissing opportunities but did Wells take his cue? No. Not really. It wasn't until the jostling finished that Wells caved and kissed her after Jo Jo had thrust her lips and more his way for probably hours of filming. When they kissed, she cheered like it was the Superbowl win. After drying off and dressing in fancy clothes, they went on to have dinner in a terribly hot room with 1,000 candles, which made Wells continue to dodge, sweat and stutter. During their conversation, the nervous Ned said he didn't believe in true love, never realizing he was digging his own Bachelor grave. YOU"RE OUTTA HERE! We kinda screamed from my viewing party. Wells was not Jo Jo material and she knew it. Funny, sweet guy but not ready for prime time, if you know what I mean.

James

On the group date, the players, I mean contestants, I mean daters went to a street fair and ended up playing soccer. James, the man who lost lots of pounds of Margherita pizza to be on the show was measuring himself to the other buffed jocks and came up short but the Buenos Aires soccer GK let James' ball through the goal in what looked like a setup and he got a Jo Jo kiss. Imagine me coughing here saying "fixed" into the cough. James is too insecure for Jo Jo and at the after party James proves that in throwing his best buddy in the house, Jordan, under the bus for Jo Jo. He trash talks Jordan and Jo Jo doesn't know what to believe. She takes cool Luke aside and he goes in for the kill by kissing her passionately and grabbing her "hip." He later gets the rose, mostly for being the least afraid to kiss her. Which doesn't mean he's the best husband material but those two sure can swap spit!

Chase

The two on one with Derek and Chase is a stupid class in Tango dancing. Not that a tango class would be stupid but the producers and director REALLY missed the mark with this one, having both men pulling on Jo Jo in a fight to win her heart. The dance sequence was cringe worthy and dumb and below the intelligence level of the people who like to watch this show, like me. People who draw the line at extremely stupid but watch the show anyhow.
At dinner, Jo Jo cut Derek, the guy who looks like Jim on The Office and I was incredulous! Why keep Chase, Dudette? She must have her reasons but we have no idea. At my viewer party we all agreed that Chase must have something we couldn't all see besides his stone-faced expression that rarely smiles and big muscles.

Alex

At the rose ceremony, in a Game of Thrones type hall (where Cersei blew up Marjorie and the gang,) Jo Jo gives everyone roses but Alex and James who I think she should just put in a limo and forget about. After a tense moment asking Chris Harrison something about the rules of The Bachelor, she went back in the room and gave both men roses. This seemed like a slap in the face for Derek fans. She gave James and Alex roses?????
What was she thinking? I left the party mad at Jo Jo, vowing to not watch the following week which turned out fine because it was a rerun.

Derek

Two weeks have passed and now I've forgiven Jo Jo and am ready for the next episode even though Derek won't be appearing. I've learned that Derek has gone on to use his media fame to draw attention to a cause close to his heart--raising money for victims of domestic abuse. Now that is a classy thing to do.




Kim Hornsby is a Bestselling Author of Suspense and Romance who lives in the Seattle area near a former Bachelor and personally knows a Bachelor and Bachelor in Paradise alumni. Her opinions are her own and not those of the dogs lying at her feet begging for treats.
Find her books on Amazon, including The Husband Hunt, a novella strangely similar to a season of The Bachelor.

The Bachelor Breaks the Cardinal Rule!!!!

Jamaica Mon, on The Bachelor!

Ben has three women left at this point and all three women are in love with the hunky software salesman from Indiana. Or they think they are. It's my opinion that at this point they have a form of Stockholm Syndrome and are in love with the only man they've seen for months, a man who is made out to be the next James Bond and their feelings in this captivity have led them to believe they love Ben. It's clever how the producers limit their time with the Bachelor and control the women's experiances. That's why the Fantasy Suite dates are essential. They actually get to spend uninterrupted hours to find out who this guy really is. Forget the bed. The women don't have cameras in their faces, directors telling them where to stand, producers prompting them for dirt on another girl.

The first date last night was Caila and Ben's float on a raft down a river to the Jerky Center where they ate barbeque and drank from coconuts. Caila was worried and quiet and not herself and Ben sensed it. Conversation was stilted.
Later, at the dinner table, she confessed her worry about the other relationships. He basically told her to trust him so she did, and bravely revealed that she loved him. Fireworks went crazy in the background as they stood in thigh deep (probably cold) water to pose and kiss. They woke up the next morning and blissfully kissed, drank coffee, and smiled a lot, like lovers do.

Lauren's date with Ben involved releasing newborn sea turtles to the ocean, an activity I missed doing by one day recently in Nicaragua. (There were no new hatches the day I was at the turtle beach.) Lauren and Ben had loads of one day old Hawksbills to watch as they hobbled to the sea instinctively. Who wasn't moved to almost tears to see these babies head to what will probably be their early demise in the ocean. Not many make it. Not like in Finding Nemo.
That night, Lauren and Ben found a reggae band on the street and sat at the Bachelor dinner vignette to read the Fantasy Suite card. Lauren told Ben that he's the man of her dreams and also revealed that she loved him. For the first time in Bachelor history the Bachelor said it back and I almost fell off my chair and spilled my two buck Chuck. Are they allowed to say that? He did! These two seemed very much in love and I pretty much had this contest all sewn up at this point but wait...

The next day with Jo Jo went swimmingly. She wears skimpy, sexy clothes, have you noticed? Her bikini at YS Falls was strange and highlighted her assets. She and Ben swam and talked and kissed and when she revealed she loved him, Ben said he loved her too. Jo Jo's mouth feel open. WHAT? She took this to mean that she is the ONE, I was pretty sure, and fell the rest of the way in love with Ben. Isn't this the Bachelor Cardinal Rule #1? Do not say those love words until your propose to that one girl at the very end??? Whether the show's psychologist warned Ben or not, we'll never know.

The Fantasy Suite card presented itself at dinner and off they went to the Romeo and Juliet room for privacy. In the morning, they fed each other fruit, declared their love for each other and off Ben went to ponder what to do after telling two women that he loves them. He forgot to tell Caila that he loves her! But wait. He doesn't exactly.
When Caila decided to surprise him with a visit to his guest house on the other side of the island, he sat her down on the cold hard stairs outside his suite and delivered the cold, hard truth. She had to leave. She started to, then got out of the car to ask him when he knew he wasn't in love with her. Good move, Caila! She got a satisfactory answer and cried all the way to the airport.
At the rose ceremony sisterwives Lauren and Jo Jo wondered where Caila got to until Ben arrived to say he'd sent her home. They toasted awkwardly, group hugged awkwardly, and tried to smile even though all three of them knew that one of them would be crying their eyes out in the next few days. Well, maybe two of them. Ben is a soft-hearted guy.

The Women Tell All was filmed Saturday night in Los Angeles and the Chicken Enthusiast was invited to attend--and Sheila, the little chicken who she loves. Sheila had to fly cargo, unlike a tiny dog who can go under the seat in front but the little chicken handled her trip to Hollywood like a trooper. Tiara, the chicken enthusiast had never been more proud of a chicken in her life. Sheila was held by Chris Harrison and Elan Gale for selfies, got on-camera time and even squawked at an appropriate moment during the taping. We aren't sure if Tiara will get edited out but the fact that they invited someone who was let go the first night, was an exciting honor for our girl from Washington State.
Tune in Monday to see if Sheila the chicken gets air time, if they cut away to Tiara's mid-riff showing outfit or if they call out Leah for lying about throwing Lauren B under the bus!

Pigs and Rats on The Bachelor!

Last night on The Bachelor things got off to a great start with Ben stupidly asking Olivia if she is the villain in the house. Of course she said no and tears followed. Apparently she likes to talk about "smart things" and she likes "thinking" and the other girls just do not. Oh an don't forget, Olivia, to add "the other girls aren't extremely competitive backstabbers."

Ben did not snatch Olivia's rose away, much to the chagrin of the other ladies, and when the camera cut to a shot of Olivia saying "Come at me, Bro," I almost did one of those surprise wine spits across the room.
Jennifer, someone we didn't get to hear from much, did not get a rose, went home, and also missed a great opportunity to warn Ben of Olivia.
The happy group toasted to going next to the Bahamas like it was an all-expense paid vacation to a tropical island (which it was!) and off they went. We cut to a commercial of Ben selling Disneyland and a special honoring 60 years of fun over there. At least is wasn't Mickey D's again. Talk about the Hawking Higgins!
At the Grand Isle Villas (product placement again) the gals cracked open the champs and settled in to the couch to hear Chris H wish them a wonderful week and hand out a date card for Caila, a girl who has already had a one on one with Ben if you don't count plugging Ice Cube and his sidekick's movie a few weeks ago. This made Leah, a seldom heard from girl in the harem, mad/disappointed. She's hardly ever even talked to the Bachelor so why is he keeping her around? It's called filler,

Leah and just be glad you got to hang around. The Chicken Enthusiast had to go home after 3 days in Los Angeles!!!!
Ben and Caila take off on a big boat to go deep sea fishing, every woman's dream date. Ahem. While Caila was reeling in a tuna, Leah was crying her eyes out back at the villa about how she hasn't had time with Ben. Then the happy couple took a leap off the tuna tower! Weeeee.

 It was funny editing, comparing the fun fish-killing date to drama back in the girls' villa. Once they washed the fishy smell off, Ben and Caila try to talk heart-to-heart but Caila is one confusing gal! She loves Ben but worries she'll break his heart, but she has real feelings for him but she doesn't. And why is it when we cut to Lauren B, her eyes are always red? Is she allergic to salt air?
The next day was a date that every woman has dreamed about all her life--sharing your boyfriend with 6 other women to go swim with ravenous pigs off a rocky island. Yes, you read that right. The women were given a plastic pail filled with hot dogs and apparently the resident pigs don't care who they trample to get the tasty confection.

Forget sharks. Did we know pigs swam that well? I didn't. Or had such bad manners? Well, I did know that because I often tell my children at the dinner table to stop eating like pigs.
Lauren H holds a piglet that looks like it would've latched on if given the chance. Ben thought it was all great fun but not only were the women upset about how much time he devoted to Lauren B. but the pigs have ruined the fun by showing their dangerous side. Leah had a perfect chance to grab Ben to talk but instead, complained about never getting time to talk with him while a pig squeals in the background.

Luckily, when they cleaned up for cocktails, they'd left Pig Island and were back at the Villa. Leah tried another tactic and threw Lauren B under the Ben bus by saying Lauren B is two-faced (excuse me, do you mean Olivia?) and then denied it with the girls. Lauren cried and was really upset when Ben told her, understandably so, but Amanda gets the rose.
Later, Leah saw an opportunity and put on her shortest shorts, teased her hair and went to Ben's bachelor pad to essentially rat out Lauren some more. He sent her packing and out she goes, on the next flight home. Geez, Leah. Rule #47 - Don't use your precious time to talk trash about the other girls to the Bachelor.
The next date was a two on one, the worst type of date in the history of The Bachelor, not just because 50% of the girls on the date go home at the end but it's just plain stupid. Does anyone else think that the Bachelor is asked "Okay, who do you want to cut loose and we'll put them on a two on one with someone you want to stay?"

The thing with this date with Emily and Olivia is that the producers made a big deal about Emily hating Olivia, then got The Mouth to trash talk Emily on camera and off they went on a terrible date in a hurricane-force wind. The speed boat deposited them on a sandy island (no pigs?) and wine was poured while Emily's hair hid her whole face in the raging wind and Olivia had the sense to scrunchie hers. Ben took Olivia on a walk with the rose and she thought she had this in the bag but when he broke the news that he couldn't reciprocate her feelings, it was the sweetest revenge!!! I'm sorry but if you talk stink about everyone else on national TV, you have to accept the fact that they are going to let you stand on a tiny island by yourself crying
while your boyfriend takes off for home with your enemy and then have the helicopter circle your lonely body on the beach for effect. My sources tell me that Olivia is really upset at how the show is portraying her but come on! No one put those words in her mouth when she said that Emily was immature and the date would be more like she and Ben were taking a child along.
Bye Bye, Olivia.
A commercial came on for Stella Artois (a fine beer!) that apparently gives money to a clean water project with every sale. Well done, beer company. #BuyaLadyaDrink
At the rose ceremony, we have JoJo, Becca, Emily, the Laurens, Amanda and Caila. They didn't leave us hanging and we said goodbye to Lauren H, the kindergarten teacher who modeled last week in Mexico.
Next week, it looks like everyone has buckets of tears, including Ben, so if you like watching people who are miserable, you'll love the show! Oh and The Bachelor has a big party on Sunday night celebrating 20 years of manipulating a dating situation to sell products on TV. Can't wait.

Kim Hornsby is a Bestselling, Award-Winning Suspense Author who can be found on Amazon here. She uses this blog to exercise her funny muscle and because she loves to hear herself talk.

Bachelor Producers Give Olivia her Own Show!

This week on the Bachelor the star of the show was Olivia, the News Anchor from Austin Texas who likes to hold her mouth open for long periods of time to show surprise. We saw Olivia in blue, Olivia in red, also plaid, Olivia with curled hair, straight hair, no makeup, fully made up, etc. You get the idea. It was like The Olivia Show. Sixteen times, we cut to a private interview to hear what Olivia thought. SIXTEEN TIMES!

The episode began with the flight to Mexico City! "Viva La Mexico" Ben yells for the camera. It's interesting to note that the Bachelor person always flies separately from the girls. I believe this is purposefully done to keep these women chomping at the bit to see their "boyfriend"... reminds me of the Stockholm Syndrome.
The ladies check in to the opulent Four Seasons Hotel in Mexico City and we begin the Olivia Show with a cut to her head and neck telling us that she and Ben have a special love, unlike all the others. She feels it. She's special.

Amanda, the petite mom with the small voice gets the one on one date and then we cut to Olivia to hear her comments on this. Not happy.

At 4 a.m. the next morning, Ben is let into their suite and with a flashlight, wakes them up, calling their names, looking for Amanda who amazingly sleeps in full makeup, hair done, and wearing a cute outfit.

Don't tell me she didn't know this was happening. The others had their weaves on the nightstand, were wearing retainers, had teddy bears in their arms and had "dragon breath" - Olivia
The date takes Ben and Amanda to board a hot air balloon where they cruise over the pyramids and cuddle and talk and kiss. I thought Amanda looked frightened, either of Ben or the balloon experience but that could just be me. At the picnic spot, they looked perfectly in sync and talked about Amanda's ex husband who is now probably trying to do damage control for being outed as a bad dad on national TV. That night, after suiting up in fancy duds, they sat at a table for two, sipping drinks, talking about how it's hard for Amanda to switch from Mom mode to sexy siren mode. Fair enough.

The group date included everyone but Lauren H who almost spilled red wine on a white couch when she heard her name not being called. It meant that she'd get the last one on one. Again we cut to Olivia for her opinion on this and she made some faces and did some minor trash talk.
The date began with a Spanish Lesson by a teacher who held one of those old fashioned pointers. Ben learns how to say "I love you, will you marry me and will you accept this rose." How about "back off Olivia"? (that's what I was kind of hoping for) Olivia gets more camera time, Emily drops in for her comments on Olivia and we see that the producers are creating a cat fight moment in the works. Jubilee is not happy with Ben having 10 other girlfriends. Not at all.
They walked to a restaurant & market where a scary-looing woman in tight braids and her brother divided them into teams of two and gave them each a shopping list. Olivia and Jubilee grabbed Ben and wouldn't let go. Finally Olivia "claimed him" and they all went downstairs to shop for ingredients. It's a cooking competition and no one in the group but Ben likes to cook, apparently. Olivia got more air time, hung off Ben, fed him food and they drank tequila as they shopped.
Strangely, we cut to a commercial that features Sean and Catherine, Desiree and Chris and Ben, touting McDonald's food. What???? How much did they get paid to do this? I have to think Catherine is thinking "this will buy all the baby nursery furniture" as she pretends to eat Mickey D food.

Back at the restaurant, the girls pretty much failed at cooking. Olivia put dried crickets on her and Ben's food and didn't get the laugh she hoped for. Lauren B and Jubilee won the competition with an edible fish dish but they got absolutely nothing for their effort.
That night at the cocktail party, Olivia grabbed Ben mid-sentence and claimed him once more, making her the most hated girl in the house. Maybe not most hated girl ever because she hasn't faked a panic attack yet. Oh, wait. She did that last week.

Emily got more riled and talked about telling Ben that Olivia is a bully. "I'm not afraid to say that," she says. Jubilee is not good in a group date setting and her insecurities made her bitch material when Ben tried to take her aside for a talk. She's pissed to be sharing Ben and the writing on the wall had Ben asking her to leave the show. She exited tearfully and we are sad to see her go. We liked her but she just couldn't separate her relationship from the other girls' relationships. Crash and burn.

JoJo takes Ben aside for a talk and is real and sweet and truthful and of course, Olivia doesn't like that someone else in talking to her man. I'm kind of sick of hearing from Olivia at this point. I wouldn't mind hearing from Leah or Jennifer please. But Olivia got the rose, flaunted it and we dislike her.

The next one on one date is Lauren H, the blonde kindergarten teacher with the funny faces. It happened to be Fashion Week in Mexico City and they ended up modeling for a designer in his fashion show. Both Ben and Lauren did a stand up job with their soft elbows on the runway. They looked bored as hell (as models do!) while they walked the walk and did a fine job. "Holy Shoot!" Lauren says (in case parents of students are watching) Ben does the sexiest little wink at her as they pass on the runway and it's worth finding that moment on your TV to see. Here's the last 1/4 second of the wink below...

Their twosome dinner/drinks went well and Lauren H got the rose. Because they both sleep with a retainer, they found common ground that bonds them beyond a physical attraction, you see.

At the rose ceremony on a rooftop patio, Olivia is still getting oodles of camera time and when she said hearing Amanda's story of her kids reminds her of an episode of Teen Mom, Olivia buries herself, socially. Ben isn't there to hear but the girls decided that is the final straw. Emily went off to tell Ben about Olivia who is still acting all haughty after her inappropriate comment. Mid-cry Emily saw Olivia coming down the stairs to crash Ben and Emily's moment and Emily runs off like the place is on fire instead of confronting her. This is totally expected from a girl who sleeps with a teddy bear.
Amanda also tells Ben that Olivia is a bully (when he specifically asks her) and he's shocked. Well done, Amanda. That gets the Bachelor thinking maybe Olivia isn't all she pretends to be. He should just ask her outright because of course she will tell him the truth.
Okay, this is the moment on every show where the girls hate one girl, the Bachelor can't see it and he keeps her on in spite of what he's been told. RED FLAG! I have to think the producers insist that the hated girl has to stay for another week and give some excuse that satisfies the Bachelor because this happens every time!!!!
When Ben asks to speak to Olivia privately, we see To Be Continued on the screen but we know. She'll fake ignorance, he'll feel badly for her and she'll stay. After all, she has that rose in her clutches. Next week we'll see this all go down but I don't need to wait on pins and needles. I know.
They didn't give Olivia 16 cut to camera shots this week to let her walk away. And I counted how many times we had to hear from the mouth from the south about her overly competitive attitude.

Note to Olivia: This is what good sportsmanship looks like...

I do not watch the after party live show anymore as it makes me lose all respect for myself by wasting a perfectly good hour.

This is Ben's Charity and probably one of the reasons he did THE BACHELOR -- to raise awareness.
Humanity and Hope


Kim Hornsby is a Bestselling, Award-Winning Suspense Author who can be found on Amazon here. She uses this blog to exercise her funny muscle and because she loves to hear herself talk.

Chicken Enthusiast Booted Back to the Barnyard!

OH NO! We really wanted that chicken lover, Tiara, to stay and talk more about her passion for chickens and now that darned Ben has gone and ruined our chances of getting to know the only person on this season of THE BACHELOR who had enough of a sense of humor to list her profession as a Chicken Enthusiast. The only gal who playfully had a photo of Ben in her house along with photos of her chickens and interestingly enough, the only person on the show not drinking. Yep, you heard me. The Chicken Enthusiast does not need to drink to stay happy or relaxed or fun. She only has to think of her chickens and happiness floods over her like a veil of that mesh fencing stuff we all use in our backyards to keep bunnies out of our veg garden. I think it's called chicken wire.
Anyone sick of the chicken jokes yet?
I really thought after her little introductory movie in Redmond WA with the chickens, we'd see more of Tiara but I know on The Bachelor they edit out a ton. On the first night, the girls line up to speak to Ben and only a few of the conversations get aired. He said "Beautiful" three times looking at her. I wished they'd shown their conversation. I saw photos online of Tiara and Ben talking by the fireplace, engaged in a conversation. Go to her Instagram account. He has his hand on her leg! (Her name is Mizz_Minxy)
Maybe it takes a special person to understand a woman who has bonded with barnyard animals but as a viewer I felt like we got a promise of some really good fun with this gal and then never really saw her again (aside from those nervous looks and facial ticks during the rose ceremony.) Bummer!
The Bachelor producers missed the fun boat with this kooky twenty-seven-year-old, this woman who decided after she made all the cuts and auditions it takes to get on The Bachelor, that she'd list her profession as something that is her passion, instead of listing "dental assistant."
And Lace over Tiara?  What the heck? I can see where Lace makes good TV but what about a Chicken Enthusiast????

I'd like to take two or three sentences to tell you that Chicken Enthusiast is not a job, it's like saying Dog Lover. The Bachelor producers encourage this type of thing to make the show more interesting. One girl listed her profession as unemployed and you have to know that they are ALL essentially unemployed when they go on the show because they have to leave jobs for a maximum of 3 months.
Tiara chose to not list dental assistant but write chicken enthusiast. There are lots of people around the planet who think keeping chickens in cages where they can't stand up or move is unethical. That's what a chicken enthusiast is. I looked it up. And I'm now one. Kind of.
I don't blame Tiara for championing for chicken rights on The Bachelor. Girls go on for selfish reasons. The Chicken Enthusiast from Redmond seems to have chosen her cause and guess what? It's a worthy one if you think about it.
Anyways, Tiara is gone, off the show now, never to know Ben in the romantic sense and never to return, but wouldn't it be fun if she was on the After Show with Chris Harrison live? We could get to see her again and she might even bring one of her chickens (like Sheila!) as long as she could fit Sheila under the seat in front of her long legs on the flight from Seattle to Los Angeles. Tiara already has all the camera ready clothes for several weeks worth of appearances seeing she packed duds and dresses for months and came home several days after she left. Wouldn't you like to see the Chicken Enthusiast in the low cut gold mini dress with the killer stilettos? Imagine Blake Lively in that movie where she was younger than her elderly daughter and looked drop dead gorgeous in a cocktail dress. Ya, you got it

How about it America and Beyond. Do you want to see Tiara, the Chicken Enthusiast next week and have her explain what happened with Ben?
Let's start a twitter campaign to get her on the live show!! I'm making this up as I go along but I have to agree with myself here about the potential of what I just suggested!
I'll know if you all feel the same way if suddenly the internet lights up with this hashtag #BringBackTiara
I thought about using the ChickenEnthusiast hashtag, like Tiara has been doing, but I have to say that the propensity to spell enthusiast improperly is great. I had to sound it out, and I'm a professional writer. It's too much work for tweeters and Instagram fans.
Just go to Twitter, write your tweet, include the hashtag and send it to #BachelorNation and #TheBachelor
Here's an example you can copy and paste, then add you own message.

 Loved the #ChickenEnthusiast! How 'bout the live show next week? #BachelorNation #BringBackTiara
#TheBachelor @chrisbharrison RT pls

Looks like a great season ahead of us. I for one look forward to seeing what happens in the next weeks and how it all unfolds even though we'll be doing it without ever getting to know that Chicken Enthusiast. How 'bout you?

Kim Hornsby is the author of The Husband Hunt, a short novel series based on The Bachelor. The first book is free on Amazon right now. Go straight to the free romance book or find Kim and her bestselling books on her Amazon site.

Surprise Breakup on The Bachelorette!

It's been days since the Monday night installment of The Bachelorette and I can only account for my apathy by saying I'm disheartened to be so close to the end with Nick still in the running. His presence takes the wind out of my busybody sails. But I must press on...

We are still in Ireland, in beautiful Killarney National Park (west of Cork) where it's cold for April and Kaitlyn can wear cute boots and scarves on her dates with leather jackets. Hey, part of this is seeing what everyone is wearing right?
The remaining men are Joe, Nick, Ben, Shawn and Jared-- all good choices. Or almost all.
Ben gets his one on one date where he and Kaitlyn take a royal blue rowboat to the island across the way to play hide and seek at the ruins. Ben is a sweetheart but is he too nice for Kaitlyn who seems to like danger? More danger than hide and seek can provide.
They suit up for dinner and conversation later at a quaint old stone cottage with a fireplace that looks like a pot of gruel should be hanging over the flames, and Ben confesses he has worried in the past that he's unlovable. During this conversation, Kaitlyn thinks Ben might still have his V card and flat out asks him. His reaction is pretty cute. No, he's be around the block a few times. Phew!

The next date card says "Let Love Run Amok" and my thought is a 5K race through mud. Shows what I know. It's a three on one date with Joe, Shawn and Nick to Killarney National Park where they freeze their buns off on the picturesque grounds of yet another castle. They sit around in a vignette from Pottery Barn on the expansive and well-manicured lawn while Kaitlyn takes each man aside to talk, Joe being last. He's falling in love with her but she clearly isn't feeling the same and seems to tell him that. She kind of says sorta what's bugging her and neither us at home, or Joe, get the exact message. Is she going to work on her feelings or is this a breakup? He's not sure she's telling him to leave the show and we only figure this out when she asks for a hug and stands up. The standing hug after a conversation like that is the final stage of a Bachelorette breakup but Joe still doesn't get it and asks what he's supposed to do. Is she going to try to muster some love for him in the next week or what? I didn't understand either.Nope, she's done, and when she starts to walk away, he uses a profanity, she gets pissed, and that's that. Goodbye Joe! That was weird, I say at home. "Joe didn't understand what she was doing!!!" It was weird and cruel the way she did that!

Back at the vignette she doesn't give out the rose, chooses Shawn for the evening date, and Nick goes back to the suite with his tail between his legs. Shawn is excited for a fun evening but Kaitlyn's plans for the date are anything but fun. She drops the bomb that she slept with Nick and kind of regrets doing that too early. Shawn has a moment with himself in the GENTS, and comes back saying he still wants to give this a go. He loves this girl.
Meanwhile Nick is complaining his face off to Jared and Ben back at the Bachelor pad. Shut up, Nick!
At the rose ceremony the next night, they line up like cattle ready for the slaughter and when Shawn is offered the first rose, he takes her into the next room to ask "Why Nick?" It's a fair question but Kaitlyn tells him it's her decision and shuts him down. Shawn accepts the rose, and the only one without a rose at the end of musical roses is Jared! What??? I thought she had a great connection with him. True to Jared's character, he tells her that he only hopes she ends up happy and leaves with such dignity that when he cries in the car pulling away, we realize how sweet that guy actually is.

The show moves to Cork, a seaside, gorgeous Irish town and Nick gets the next date. They walk around Cork, end up in another church and instead of making out, they talk about religion. That is a good talk to have before choosing a man for your husband! That night, they end up having drinks at the decrepit jail/ruins where a mock bedroom has been set up in a cell for their fantasy suit date. Prank! Nick tells Kaitlyn that he loves being next to her, while chewing on his knuckles like a love sick teen, and vents about Shawn.
Cut to the next morning where Kaitlyn looks satisfied in her robe and they're drinking coffee and reading the paper. Almost. Nick admits he's allergic to dogs and that would be a deal breaker for me but Kaitlyn keeps looking at him all blurry-eyed.
I'm disappointed at this point, like when Ben Flajnik chose Courtney.
Meanwhile, later that day Shawn finds Nick's silo number with the hotel operator and stomps over to his silo cottage to confront the man he believes is his nemesis. And that's pretty much where we leave it for this week. Shawn is so lovesick he can't stand it, Nick is going in for the win and Ben hasn't a clue.
here's only one reason why I'm rooting for Shawn Booth:

Any man who can pick up a full-grown Golden Retriever in one arm, must have crazy arm muscles. (Kidding-- he loves dogs!)

AND, Men Tell All was filmed yesterday (July 11th) in Los Angeles and apparently the men tell ALL! Everyone was looking suntanned and bright-eyed in the Instagram pics I saw.

Spoiler Alert: Don't read if you don't want to know the final two!
Apparently Kaitlyn let slip in a People mag interview that she's behind Ben H as the next Bachelor, thereby alerting us to the final two.

Kaitlyn Throws One Man Under a Very Heavy Bus!

Last night we watched Kaitlyn and the men throw another man under the bus to stay on a reality TV show.

The Bachelorette kicked off last night's show with the drama of Nick Viall's arrival. Pulling a tiny carry-on to the men's suite, Nick then seated himself across from the eleven men while they shot daggers at him with their eyes.
Silence. Tra la la. More silence.
AWKWARD!

Tanner has taken it upon himself to be the group's spokesperson in this matter. He seemed to know that Nick had dinner with Andy last month and I was impressed with his wealth of knowledge. Especially because cell phones and such are taken at the beginning of this process and the ability to look anything up on the internet or watch TV isn't possible. Tanner knows a little too much to be normal.

For the rose ceremony they took off to Citi Field, the home of the Mets baseball team where JJ carried Kaitlyn around the bases to get back on track with female dating (even though he was wearing pink socks and told one of the guys he was the most handsome one there.) Shawn B was clearly upset that Nick Viall was still there and told Kaitlyn that her actions weren't matching up. She wants honesty above everything, she said.
The Rose Ceremony was on the baseball diamond where it appeared to be absolutely freezing according to the men's blue lips. (Kaitlyn wore a wool coat and gloves.) No surprises on who went home and I can't even tell you their names but I'll try--Cory, Jonathon and scarf guy with cool glasses. Nick stayed, like we knew he would.

Next, they were off to San Antonio Texas to the St. Anthony Hotel where Ben H got the first one on one date. I like Ben. He's someone who hasn't said a heckuvalot but when he does, it makes sense. They took off in a vintage FORD truck to a dance hall where they entered a Two Step contest after a lesson. THIS DATE TOTALLY ROCKED!
Now this is what I'm talking about when I say that the wrestling dates are stupid. This is the perfect type of date. They danced, laughed, met a bunch of middle-aged people who thought they were cute, drank beer, and listened to Del Washington and his Big White Hair sing a song called Quick Quick Slow Slow. Kissing followed and Ben H secured himself a frontrunner spot.

Back at the house, Nick was blabbing on and on and trying to fit in (?) but I yelled "Shut Up Nick" to the TV. There was a day I liked Nick but I think it was the nasty phone call that he made from the plane that was filmed and circulated after he left Andi's season, that ruined it for me. Calling Kaitlyn a "cool chick" didn't earn him any popularity points when he walked in either.

On the group date the remaining guys (except Shawn B) dressed in Mariachi Costumes (tight pants, big hats) and wrote Kaitlyn songs to the tune of the Frito Bandito song. Nick took her up to a balcony to serenade her, (the guys thought it was a good move) and Ian totally choked again to sing in public, like a little scared puppy. I can tease him because just wait until how this man digs himself into an early grave later.

After, Kaitlyn gave Joshua a bad haircut that seemed like an especially terrible idea when she accidentally shaved one side of his head, he took her aside to divulge his hatred for Nick. The worst part of this revelation was that she turned his words around to make it sound like he told her everyone else was lying to her (about Nick's popularity) when in fact, he was simply telling her that no one likes Nick. Pretty much true! Joshua then slipped back in to the log house cocktail party and made his second mistake by lying to the guys by saying he was doing an interview. They knew he'd taken Kaitlyn aside and when she marched in to throw Joshua under the bus about hating Nick, the men stepped aside and let him fly. Even Tanner, who is very vocal about not trusting Nick was silent as Joshua got run over by sixteen heavy bus wheels.

The 1 on 1 went to Shawn B. Kaitlyn said she even loves Shawn's smell. That is a good sign that she is falling for the Ryan Gosling look alike. They kayaked down a picturesque river, had a romantic dinner and Shawn got the rose. No drama so it didn't get much time on camera.
The next night, Ian the Princeton graduate who has a lot of sex, if he wants it, was bragging and clearly feeling upset that he has no connection with Kaitlyn. Buddy: She's not the right girl for you so walk away gracefully, don't shove down our throats that you should go on to be the next Bachelor. After saying how great you are and that you get lots of sex, you are doomed, Man. You may not even be invited to any after parties when she boots your butt next week for telling her she is a surface level person. Can you say "Sour Grapes"????

Jared got to cross the hall to Kaitlyn's rose- petaled bed where they kissed and he secretly collected petals to form a rose in hopes that she will forget if she already gave him one or not. As much as he looks like he'll turn into a wolf during a full moon, he's actually quite a cutie.

Next week we see who goes home. I predict Ian will leave to get some sex from ladies who realize what a catch he is, maybe Justin because I can't even remember who this is, and Joshua for shooting off his mouth and letting her buzz the left side of his head. What do you think?

Spoilers Ahead:


Scroll down to hear what I've heard through Bachelor Nation....









According to Social Media buzz a photo was posted of Kaitlyn in bed with her boyfriend last week and it was none other than Shawn B. the Ryan Gosling guy. It went up on Snapchat for a few minutes and was taken down, making us wonder if they end up together or if The Bachelor producers staged something.
Also, Nick Viall was spotted getting cozy with Whitney Bischoff, the ex-fiancee of Chris Soules. Uggh. The thought makes me kind of want to hurl in sympathy for Whitney.